Small Things with Great Love

Thanks for the sleep Anna!

2012-02-18T07:28:00.001-06:00

I'm really hoping we're back to our normal. The last week has been rough. It is overwhelming chasing two toddlers all day off of two hours of sleep. I know, I know, people do it all the time. And I respect them a great deal more after this week!

What worked? Heres's a way more lengthy than I intended post on what worked. I can look back and see how silly it seemed to be so upset over just one week of bad sleep :-)

Well, I was pretty much at my wits end with her in the middle of the night. After being asleep only 2 or 3 hours, she would wake up and scream (a "I want to poke my ears out" kind of blood curdling scream) for 1-3 hours until she finally gave into exhaustion, slept for an hour and got up again. Repeat until morning...

We tried it all. Rocking, back patting, me sitting in the room. She just kept screaming (unless we were holding her). As soon as we thought she was asleep and tried to lay her down, she screaming began again. It was overwhelming to say the least.

No one was getting any sleep.

So we talked to her doctor yesterday (Friday). Here's what her opinion on the matter was. Anna probably woke up the first few nights from constipation (my original thought) from the whole milk. They are very habit forming at this age especially. She said it only takes one or two nights for them to pick up bad habits. She said most likely, especially with Anna who learns very quickly, she's getting up with the intention of getting us in her room, to snuggle. I LOVE to snuggle my baby, but not for 2 hours in the middle of the night...

So she suggested we stick with something, being very consistent with whatever it was. If we didn't mind her in our bed, we could do that (I mind...). If we didn't mind her being rocked every night, we could try that. If we didn't mind her crying for a little while, we could try that.

Let me back up one night... Thursday night I had hit a breaking point. I couldn't continue this. When Anna got up the first time, I let her scream. We've let her cry it out once or twice before, but what I really mean is we let her play it out in her crib. Never before has she screamed like that during the night. I'm not a propnent of that method of sleep training, but sometimes you have to resort to the last resort. So we did. And she cried. For like 45 minutes. But during this time, she'd stop, look around, see if we were responding, and then continue crying. She knew exactly what she was doing and how to get us to rock her. She definitely had an agenda with all that crying. So after her screamfest, she calmed down and sat in her crib for an hour or so until she fell asleep. There was no crying though. She was calm, playing with her giraffe, and evening talking happily at one point.

I was worried she'd hate me. I was worried that I'd scar her for life, making her scream like that and that all the bonding we've done her whole life would be washed away in one night. Sleep deprivations causes me to fear the worst... I think it depends on the child and on what's bothering them. In Anna's case, she's strong willed. She needs clear boundaries or she will take advantage of them.

So after talking with her doctor, determining that there's nothing else wrong, she's just gotten into a bad habit, we said that last night we'd let her cry it out again if we needed to. Hubby agreed and we went to bed expecting the worst.

She got up once. She fussed for 5 minutes (notice, I didn't say screamed!). Then she played with her giraffe, laid down and fell asleep. 30 minutes after she woke up, she was sleeping soundly again. She didn't get up again until 6:45 which is perfectly normal.

I know people feel strongly against letting them cry it out. I'm not saying it's the best way, for me it was a last resort, that we desperately needed. And after a praying a sleep-intention rosary last night while putting her to sleep, I felt at peace about sticking with my gut. She woke up as happy as can be this morning, ready to love on her mom and dad. She woke up without bags under her eyes which had become the norm. And so did we. Just in time for her 1 year pictures today.

And as a reward? Two Gee-Gees! She pulled them both out of the dryer this morning...

Tired (Updated)

2012-02-16T09:45:00.003-06:00

Update: We took her to the doctor today after a really terrible night last night. There's nothing wrong (no ear infections, sore throat, or anything) which I was pretty sure of anyway. But our doctor did say that she was probably fine with the milk, it just constipated her and since she's way big for her age, it's best to do 2% for a while to keep her bowels clear. And it was also good because we asked about her bow-leggedness. She's always been bow-legged, as most babies are. But Anna's has gotten worse and now her feet are turning in and one leg is more turned than the other. The doctor noticed it before I even mentioned it and referred us to a pediatric orthopedist. So hopefully we can help her be more balanced! Because this girl loves to RUN!

We're having severe sleep issues around here. I know I shouldn't complain. Anna has slept 8-12 hour stretches since she was 4 weeks old. I've never had to deal with sleep deprivation.

Until now, that is...

Last night she was up for hours. Screaming. And before that it took her over an hour to fall asleep.

That's not like my baby. Normally she goes to sleep peacefully after being laid down awake. She sleeps until 7am when she wakes up happy and smiling.

Not screaming and screaming and screaming. She finally went back to sleep after two hours of rocking, patting, hand holding, and me laying on her bedroom floor.

We've tried it all. I was convinced it's seperation anxiety. Like an extreme form of it. I felt like an awful mother. Until I really thought about it this morning (quite the accomplishment since I haven't had any sleep). I think it's the milk. We transitioned her to whole milk in the last two weeks. She hasn't had any issues with it, still drinks it fine, never throws up, no rashes, obvious reactions, nothing. Until about a week ago when she started this terrible sleeping. I didn't attribute the waking up and screaming to the milk, since she hadn't had any reaction prior.

But the formula is out of her system at this point. She went from having many stinky diapers a day to having just a few. They went from (sorry, TMI) pasty to rock solid. She's having gas in the middle of the night. She's refusing to eat. After consulting Dr. Goo.gle, I wanted to plant a hand on my forehead and say "duh".

The night screaming can be explained by the milk. The gas, the change in diapers, the lack of napping, the exhaustion on all of our parts can be explained by the milk.

I hope she doesn't have a milk allergy. I think maybe we just transitioned her too quickly since she seemed to do so well. We were ready to be paying $12 a month instead of $40. She handles milk products really well. She LOVES ice cream, pudding, cottage cheese, cheese of any kind, yogurt, etc... In fact, milk products are her favorite foods and never before has she had a reaction. I think her body just needed longer to transition.

So it's back to formula for this little lady. And a trip to the store for some gas drops. And lots and lots of pears and oatmeal. And maybe some prunes...

I'm ready for some sleep. I'm tired. I've never been tired like this before. I don't know how people do this for months on end, they're saints. I'm so thankful for Anna's (previous) sleep habits. I'm so thankful for my hubby's support. And boy will I be thankful if naptime lasts for longer than an hour this afternoon. And I'll be really thankful if that's all it is. And we get a good night's sleep sometime in the near future. Prayers would be greatly appreciated.

Happy Valentine's Day

2012-02-14T20:14:00.003-06:00

Anna loves Valentine's Day!

Notice the cheesy grin? That's what she does now when I have the camera out and tell her to say "cheese". I have to say, it's much better than the serious face or the hand in the camera I had been getting until now :-)

Rearrangement

2012-02-13T10:07:00.003-06:00

I finally got some pictures of our furniture/room rearrangement. We're enjoying the rearrangement, it's just so much more practical and gives us so much more room! And Anna loves all of the extra space to play and put her toys!

Living Room/Office:

After

I didn't move a whole lot in the living room, hence the lack of "before" picture. But we did move the china cabinet from one wall to anotther. We also added the pack n play which used to be in the family room. It's my changing station/place to put anything I don't want the kids getting into.

Family Room:

Before

After

We moved the couches all around and added a cabinet to one side. It is much more open now, with lots more space to play. It's one of my favorite rooms in the house. I just love the fireplace and the coziness of the room. We also got rid of the TV a while ago and had a pack n play in its place, but that's been moved too.

This is the view from the family room into the kitchen. The kitchen stayed the same :-)

Playroom/Basement:

Before

The first picture is the playroom. This was right after we moved in a few years ago, so it had a lot of junk in it, but for the last few years it's had nothing but these bookshelves in it. Not anymore :-). The other picture is the main space in the basement, our entertainment room. Or as my hubby calls it, the "man cave".

After

Here are my shelves that I was excited to finally get. The kitchen set was given to us by the daycare I used to work at when they got new ones. It's still in really good shape, I have some plans to spruce it up a little though.

Friday Quick Takes (13)

2012-02-09T23:15:00.001-06:00

--- 1 ---

This past week was the birthday of Baby S, our fallthrough adoption. You can read about that here and here and here. He was born on February 7 and the next day was when we found out his birthmom decided to parent. We pray for him and his family daily. As I thought back a year ago, it all seems surreal. I remember every detail like it was yesterday. And at the same time, I don't feel the hurt or the pain anymore. Anna healed all of that. I hope that S had a great birthday and my prayer is that he always feels loved.

--- 2 ---

Wednesday the kiddos had just gotten up from nap and were having their usual snack in their high chairs. I was doing some dishes with the radio on. Apparently I was also dancing and singing along... When I turned around, I saw two little babies laughing hysterically and looking at me. Not only were they laughing, but Anna had her hands over her ears. Apparently I looked absolutely ridiculus. And we all had a good laugh.

--- 3 ---

I love the new BumGenius Freetime diaper. It is so easy, being an all-in-one. And it dries super fast (especially compared with the Elemental which takes FOREVER to dry). It also is super absorbent. And I love the stay-dry flaps. And they are super easy to spray (again, especially compared to the Elemental). And my hubby loves the no stuffing part! And the new colors are cute, my hubby is partial to the "Albert" print, being an actuary and all :-)

--- 4 ---

Superhero? Or Karate Kid? Either way, my daughter is quite goofy :-)

--- 5 ---

Sometimes Anna wanders off to a differerent room and can be found like this... sitting in a corner. The corner was always our "time-out" place at home when I was growing up, my sister, Sara, spent her fair share of time there. So much, in fact, that we called it "Sara's Corner." When she saw this picture, she said, "That's my girl! Just turn yourself in, it makes things easier!" It's a little scary how much Anna acts like her aunt sometimes :-)

--- 6 ---

I can't wait to get my hair cut on Saturday. I thought maybe I was going to grow it out a little longer because a pony tail is just so easy everyday. But I have super duper thick hair. It never dries. Especially when it's in a pony tail. And I've always had dry, itchy, dandruffy scalp problems. Constantly wet hair makes this problem exponentially worse. So it's time to cut it again. I actually really like it short, I just hate doing it everyday. And since it's so thick, it gives me a headache after a few hours in a ponytail. So short it is!

--- 7 ---

I'd have to say Anna's favorite thing to do right now is read. We have books all over the house, and she's always got one in her hand. Her room has a ton of books and they're generally strewn all about the room. Here are her favorites, both Jeremy and I can recite all of these books. She loves anything "Touch and feel". She now expects all books to have things to feel.

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

Slam Dunk

2012-02-05T10:44:00.003-06:00

And here is where I would have inserted an adorable video of her slam dunking, but blogger STILL won't let me upload videos. Very frustrated! She loved slam dunking! It was so cute!

And completely unrelated to my daughter's amazing basketball skills, I've lost a total of 12 lbs! I was excited when I stepped on the scale this morning to reveal that I'd lost 4.6 lbs in the last two weeks! That makes me feel fantastic!

9 Years

2012-01-31T10:06:00.001-06:00

Junior prom, just 3 months after we started dating.

9 years ago today, my hubby and I went on our first date.

You can read about it here.

I wrote about it last year, and it was fun to go back and see what I was doing this time last year. I had no idea what turns our lives would take last year. And I look back with smiles.

So anyway, it's been a fabulous nine years and this year we're excited to celebrate with our beautiful addition to the family. Nine years ago I definitely didn't have any of this in mind, I was just a 17 year old girl, excited to be asked out on a date for the first time. I had no idea that the 16 year old boy that asked me out would one day be my husband and a fantastic father to our daughter.

I wouldn't trade the last 9 years of our lives for anything. There have certainly been ups and downs and together they've made us who we are today.

I love you Jeremy! Thank you for asking me out on January 31, 2003. I know for a shy kid like you, it was no easy feat, but boy am I glad you did!

Here's some throwback pictures of us as high schoolers!

I believe this was senior year, just before graduation.

Senior homecoming. Funny story, I had asked Jeremy to our junior homecoming (before we were dating) and he declined... Apparently he had to do something important like be a groomsman in his aunt's wedding that day in North Carolina.

March for Life - January 2004

Senior Prom

Who are those skinny people? :-)

11 Months Old

2012-01-28T08:52:00.004-06:00

Anna is 11 Months old today! She's getting so big and doing so much!

I can't believe my baby is almost a year old already. Each month just goes faster and faster! Here's what she's been up to!

Walking/Running: Well, when you learn to walk at 9 months old, you naturally have to start running at at 11... She tries so hard to run. Unfortunately for her, her head goes faster than her feet... She face plants a lot. She's so tough though. She never cries, just gets back up and does it again! She never crawls anymore, it is all walking. And she prefers to walk anywhere we go now which can often present a challenge. But anywhere we go a billion people stop us to say how cute she is and how little she looks to be walking.

Eating: She's turned into kind of a picky eater... I don't know when it happened or why, I think it had something to do with the stomach flu she had. Veggies/fruits? Forget it... I have to hide them right now. Dairy? She's all for it. Her favorites right now would be cottage cheese and eggs. She'll eat eggs in any form. She LOVES them! So I put veggies in her cottage cheese and fruit in her yogurt and she doesn't know any different. But she's definitely a good eater. The child loves her food!

Teeth: I forgot in my original post, but I can finally post about teeth! Anna got her first tooth at 10 months old. She the quickly got a second and now a third. She has two on bottom, one on top. I hope she continues to be this easy of a teether, we didn't even know she was getting two in at once...

Talking: This is the big one this last month. All of the sudden she's copying everything we say. She doesn't necessarily know what she's saying most of the time, but she's definitely copying anyway. Some words she's got figured out. Right now she says: Mama, Dada, Gigi (giraffe), up, down, out, more, yes, ta-da, Na-Na (For Anna, she talks about herself a lot :-), and noggin. We're not sure what noggin means, but she says it all day long! My favorite is when she says "up". She'll stand at the stairs and say "up, up" and when we let her climb the stairs, she says "up" the whole way. She'll also ask us to pick her up now. She also says "out" when she stands at the door and whe she's in her carseat (that one drives me a little crazy in the car...)

Favorites: Giraffe is still her favorite anything. She carries that silly thing around all day everyday. She won't sleep without it, won't be quiet in Mass without it, won't ride in the car without it, etc...

Her favorite person right now is definitely Dada... As I type this, she's helping him make pancakes. If dada's doing it, she wants to be a part of it. She follows him around, cries when he won't pick her up, cries when he leaves. It's pretty sweet. She also loves Mama of course, she will just come up and hug me and then go about playing. But at the moment, she's a daddy's girl totally!

She LOVES to dance. Music of any kind brings out the dancing shoes. She will dance all day long!

She loves "forts". She loves her princess tent, she frequently hangs out under the kitchen table. She'll go off and find a dark corner and sit and giggle with her giraffe. She likes to hide behind ottomans or anything that feels "fort-like". And she likes to pop out and play peek-a-boo.

Happy 11 Months Anna! You're such a blessing in our lives!

Friday Quick Takes (12)

2012-01-27T07:00:00.000-06:00

--- 1 ---

We're approved! Our Homestudy was presented last night and once again, we are approved to adopt. All that's left is to drop off a check and we're back in circulation! Now the waiting begins. I am much more calm and feeling much more patient this time around. Having our Anna to love on and enjoy every day makes a wait not so scary. It was scary last time. Although, despite my newfound patience and calmness, I'm hoping for a wait as short as last time!

--- 2 ---

My baby is 11 months old tomorrow! I just can't believe how fast the last year has gone, what a wonderful year it's been! I'm sure I'll do an 11 month update when I get a chance :-)

--- 3 ---

We got some gift cards for Christmas and I got some money for my birthday to put towards a storage unit for our playroom in the basement. I've "designed" it and know exactly what I want, so I'll be purchasing and putting that together here soon! I love organizing things!

--- 4 ---

I feel so blessed to be able to stay home with my baby. What a joy it is to watch her grow, dance, laugh, cry, etc... each and every day. I also feel blessed to be able to help a friend whose son I take care of. I know how much it means to her to have me watch him and I know it is so difficult for her to go to work each day and leave him. I'm glad that I can give her peace of mind and that Anna has such a fun friend to play with everyday!

--- 5 ---

Julie - this one is for you. Thank you so much for your ear infection advice. The lavendar oil and coconut oil seem to have worked! Thank you so very much! And Sara, I'll have to try the olive oil too... Although I hope this is the last of the ear problems for a while!

--- 6 ---

Anna and Luke were laughing hysterically today as they sat in the princess castle tent that Anna's aunt and uncle got her for Christmas. When I went over to investigate, I assumed I'd find a really cool toy or something... Nope, it was just that fun being in the tent! I couldn't help but giggle myself.

--- 7 ---

Tonight is the annual "Pack the Pit" for our high school's boys basketball. This will be mine and Jeremy's 10th Pack the Pit together. It was our first date (although at the time I didn't know it was a date...) 9 years ago. We attend the spaghetti dinner and game every year. We're excited to take Anna this year! Happy dating Anniversary hubby!

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

The Recurring Ear Infection

2012-01-24T10:23:00.000-06:00

I'm on a quest to find a natural ear infection fix for Anna.

Anna's been on 4 antibiotics in the last month now. Obviously the ear infection simply isn't going away. She's been off antibiotics for like 4 days and I'm pretty sure her ears still hurt, she's still acting like they hurt.

I'm tired of pumping her full of antibiotics only for them not to do any good anyway. They totally mess up her stomach, give her diaper rash, and still don't work! I need something more natural to support her immune system, reduce the swelling and fluid in her ears, and help her body fight the infection on its own.

This site has some (hopefully) great ideas. I'm off to our natural grocery store to pick a few things up this afternoon. Namely, ear oil, a multivitamin (with plenty of vitamn D and C) and some more probiotics. We use the probiotics when she's on an antibiotic (after some nasty yeast infections) and they work wonders on her tummy. Apparently they're great for her immune system too.

Anyone have anything else they suggest?

Hopefully in a few days, I can let you know that these things work! :-)

Life

2012-01-23T08:59:00.002-06:00

I'M SO THANKFUL...

THAT

ANNA'S

BIRTHMOM

DIDN'T SEE

MY BABY

JUST

CHOICE!

"It's a poverty to decide that a child must die so that you may live as you wish."

~Blessed Mother Teresa

My prayer and fasting today is for all of those children who never got a chance at life. And for all of those women/girls that find themselves with unwanted pregnancies, that they can choose life. And for all of those marching today in Washington D.C. for the rights of these unborn children, that their efforts and our prayers may be successful. And I pray especially today for all of those women who have made the ultimate sacrifice, giving of themselves to give their children a chance at life. In particular for one beautiful woman who gave my daughter a chance at life.

"Any country that accepts abortion, is not teaching its people to love, but to use any violence to get what it wants."

~Blessed Mother Teresa

Friday Quick Takes (11)

2012-01-20T10:02:00.001-06:00

--- 1 ---

Our new naptime routine is amazing. Anna's had fantastic naps all week this week with zero tears and no frustration on my part. She wakes up happy and smiling and we're all in better moods. What a difference a nap makes.

--- 2 ---

Paperwork, profile, video, etc... = DONE and turned in!

--- 3 ---

As of Sunday I was down another 1.5 pounds, that makes about 7 total lost so far.

--- 4 ---

Here's our latest family picture! The impressive part? We took it ourselves. We set it up on the tripod, set the timer and voila! We took it right before we did our adoption video and it turned out better than we anticipated!

--- 5 ---

Anna LOVES ice cream. Oh yeah, and chocolate cake... Yesterday was my sister, Sara's, birthday. She turned 23. So we had dinner with the fam to celebrate. And that included cake and ice cream, which we let Anna partake in. She's practicing for a month from now when she has her own birthday. And let me say, she's getting pretty good at the ice cream thing :-) And grandma gave her the giant spoon to lick after everyone was served.

--- 6 ---

We got to skype my sister, Julie, yesterday. She's the one studying abroad in Spain. It was great to hear from her, she's having a fantastic time!

--- 7 ---

Have a fantastic weekend!

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

Naptime Adjustment Day 1

2012-01-17T10:01:00.003-06:00

I mentioned in a Quick Takes that we've been having some naptime issues.

I've always rocked Anna down for nap. I've always enjoyed that time with her. I put Luke down first in his room and then Anna and I rock. It used to take her under five mintues to go to sleep and she'd sleep like 30 minutes in the morning and two hours in the afternoon.

Then we had Christmas break. And an onslaught of ear infections that wouldn't go away. I don't know if these contributed or if her toddler stubborness just kicked in or what, but naptimes had turned into a struggle.

I was rocking, and rocking, and rocking, and still rocking 30 minutes later. She was holding on to every last second, fighting to not fall asleep. When she finally fell asleep after a marathon, she slept for 20 minutes... It was taking twice as long to get her to sleep as she was actually sleeping. So not working for me. I mean, I do have another child in the house to tend to. And we're hoping to adopt another baby in the near future. I was no longer enjoying the rocking, instead I was dreading it.

So now that I think we have the ear infection under control after multiple rounds of antibiotics and lots of major butt rashes from them, it was time to do something different.

I knew she CAN put herself to sleep. She does it at night, every night. No issues there, 7:00 hits, we read a story, say our prayers, I rock her for a minute and sing to her, say goodnight, lay her down and she plays with her giraffe until she falls asleep. And sleeps until 7 the next morning.

So here's what I've done. I've moved naptime back 30-45 minutes, so like 9:30 and 1:30. She's waking up later in the mornings, so I don't think she was tired at 9. I rock her and sing to her like I do at night. I lay her down and say nigh-night. And then I leave.

And then she would get up. I think she could play in there all day without ever falling asleep.

So today I started by going back in, laying her down and saying "night-night". She stayed down for a few minutes then got back up again. I went in, laid her down and walked out. She got back up after a few minutes, so I repeated. Then she fell asleep. 20 minutes, no tears, no frustration, I got to read a book in between times and all was calm. She's already passed the 20 minutes of sleep mark, so it must be working.

We shall see how it goes, ideally she will soon be going to sleep much quicker without needing me to lay her back down. I still get my snuggle time before her nap, and she is getting a chance to be a little more independent at naptime. I hope it works, it will relieve a lot of stress and make sleeptime much more enjoyable for the both of us. And hopefully make transitioning to a brother or sister a little bit easier. I hate to make too many transitions after the fact because I know it will be enough of a transition for her as it is.

Busy Busy

2012-01-16T13:31:00.000-06:00

I feel like last week and this weekend were a whirlwind.

Friday we had our Homestudy for our second adoption. It was super quick (compared to the first one) and we were left with some paperwork and some other things that needed done. Our caseworker let us know that she was presenting couples (to be approved) next week. So we can either get our stuff in quick and be presented right away or wait until next month. Um, I'm not waiting...

So this weekend we spent a lot of time doing our paperwork. I did our new profile. We did our new video. I also figured out how to turn it into a DVD on our computer and I even created a menu (I was pretty excited, that's not generally something I would have thought I could do). It turned out neat. We've made copies of necessary paperwork, editted, contacted people, etc...

All of our "homework" is done and ready to turn in tomorrow. There are just two things we still need, but they can't be done quite yet and they won't matter as far as being approved is concerned! So we can hopefully go into circulation at the beginning of February!

We also started planning and organizing Anna's first birthday party! I ordered the invitations and they turned out super cute, and because of a coupon, they hardly cost anything! I can't believe our baby girl is turning one in just a month! It seems like yesterday that we met her for the first time! And it's amazing to watch her develop and discover new things. Just this week she's started copying things when we say them. "Out" and "up" are her favorites...

We're super excited to add another baby to our family (hopefully soon!). We feel so incredibly blessed!

Goal

2012-01-08T17:46:00.002-06:00

So one of my goals this year is to lose weight and get healthier. I don't post much about it, it's something I've struggled with for a long time, but I don't really like to talk about it...

However, I'm excited this week because after a week on Wei.ght Wa.tchers, I've lost five pounds! I'm proud of the work I've done. Not only that, but Jeremy has lost 5 pounds as well, something he's been working at.

I started losing weight at the beginning of last year. I was doing really well and then "surprise" we were parents without any notice. Eating became something I merely did because I had to, without much thought about what it was I was eating. Working out was a thing of the past, and a routine had to be established.

This year, I'm stickin with it. I'm not making any excuses. I don't necessarily care about the amount of weight lost, I'm never going to be skinny, but I can be healthy.

Last week it was eating better, this week I'm adding in my workouts again. This is where I struggle, I HATE to work out, I HATE to sweat. But I'm gonna do it anyway. Maybe if I write it and post it, I'll be more motivated to stick with it.

I don't like to let self-image get in the way of living my life, but unfortunately it has. I don't like to feel like the "fat" mom with all my friends. I don't like to look in my closet and hate my clothes because of their size and the rolls they don't hide. Sadly it's a reality that I live with and have struggled with for most of my life. I'm determined to not let it any longer.

So there, I've put it out there, now it's up to me to do something about it.

Friday Quick Takes (10)

2012-01-06T10:24:00.002-06:00

--- 1 ---

I could just do with one Quick Take here! Jeremy ~~finally~~ passed his Actuary Exam! He's tried and tried and tried again and again for this particular exam. None of the others have taken him this long, but his one was HARD! He struggled big time. But in the end, he overcame the challenging material, the intense pressure at work, the balancing of work, study, and family, and the anxieties that came with it all. I am so proud of him! I say "finally" because I've wanted this for HIM for a long tim now. I knew he needed to pass it for himself, not for anyone else. Why did he pass it this time? Because he kept a picture of Anna and I on his desk while he studied. He constantly reminded himself WHY he was taking these exams. Not for work, not for money, not for credentials, but to provide for his family, his wife and daughter. That makes me so happy. I have the best hubby in the whole world, I am so blessed!

--- 2 ---

I rearranged our family room and living room yesterday! I love the new arrangement! I'll probably post pictures one of these days, I think it looks great!

--- 3 ---

The reason I rearranged was because I had my days mixed up. We leave our Christmas decorations up until the Feast of the Epiphany. We celebrate the 12 days of Christmas, the Christmas season. For some reason, I though yesterday was the Epiphany. We were having a great day, the kiddos were being so good, so I decided to go ahead and start taking down some decorations while they played. And rearranging furniture. I left up a few nativities, but pretty much took the rest down. Then my hubby got home, asked what sparked the change (he loved it by the way) and I told him that it was the Epiphany. And he reminded me that it was Jan. 5, not the 6th like I thought. Whoops...

--- 4 ---

We're having a nap struggle around here. Anna's kinda sneaky, and oh so very smart. I think we just need to push naptimes back 45 minutes like I did today, it worked better!

--- 5 ---

My baby sister leaves for Spain tomorrow. She's studying abroad for the semester! I hope she has a blast and learns a ton. Hopefully she'll pick up on some Spanish quickly. She told us we're not allowed to adopt another baby until May 11 when she gets home, but Julie, I can't make any promises! We'll miss you a ton Julie!

--- 6 ---

We have our Homestudy next Friday! I almost have our profile done. We need to do our video and revise our paperwork. And then go back in circulation!

--- 7 ---

January in Illinois isn't supposed to look like this (50+ degrees and sunny), but I'm not complaining, I'll take it!

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

2011 Recap

2012-01-02T10:58:00.001-06:00

I find it fun to reflect on the years past. It's nice to see how things changed. This year, it's pretty clear what the highlight was...

But for memories sake, here's a month by month recap:

January was filled with the waiting game as we waited for baby boy to be born after his due date being moved back six weeks. We were excited, scared, nervous, and overwhelmed.

On February 7, Baby S was born. He was perfect, and we were thrilled. After a challenging time at the hospital that day, we went home feeling uncomfortable about the situation. The next day S decided to parent and we went home empty handed. The rest of the month was spent grieving over our loss and trying to move on. My most vivid memory of this time was when we came home on the 8th, Jeremy went outside to get the carseat and I could hear him crying from inside. He couldn't do it, he just kept saying that there should have been a baby in there. It was heartbreaking and we both realized just how much we wanted to be parents.

Little did we know that on the last day of that heart-heavy month of February, that our daughter had been born. March 10 brought complete joy as we received a phone call about Anna and picked her up four hours later. It was a whirlwind but I remember it like it was yesterday. Our lives changed forever this month!

April brough adjustments as we learned to be new parents. Anna got to meet our bishop for the first time at the Easter Vigil Mass and we had him give her a special blessing. We also met Sister Ana Pia for the first time (she was the head of Catholic Charities) and it began a special friendship. She just loves our Anna (or Annita, little Anna, as she calls her).

Anna was welcomed into the Church on May 8, Mother's Day. It was so special to share that day with my daughter. It's the first Mother's Day in 3 years that I cried all through Mass out of tears of joy instead of heartache. It was beautiful!

June was filled with lots of trips to the pool and may fun outside activities as a family. We also celebrated my grandparent's 59th wedding anniversary! We have such wonderful examples of marriage in our families!

In July Jeremy and I celebrated three years of marriage. I am so blessed to have such a wonderful husband! I look forward to many, many more!

We took our first vacation as a family of three in August. Jeremy's family took us to the Ozarks and we had a blast!

September was a very busy month. Anna started crawling at the beginning of the month (six months old), and we quickly realized she was going to be a very fun handful :-). We celebrated Anna's Adoption Day on September 19. What a wonderful day! The next day was my 26th birthday, and it was the best birthday gift ever. Also on my birthday, our dear friends had their son Matthias. A week later, our other dear friends had their son Theodore. What a wonderful blessing the month of September was!

In the month of October we got to do all things fall. We took Anna to the pumpkin patch, dressed her up for Halloween, played in the leaves, etc... We also attended Theodore's Baptism as his Godparents and enjoyed our trip up north to see them!

Nothing too eventful hit us in November, but we thoroughly enjoyed being thankful for Anna on her first Thanksgiving. She also started walking at the very end of the month, at 9 months old. Everyone kept telling me how busy things got when they started walking, but I've really enjoyed having a walker. She follows me around a lot and it's fun to watch her explore at a whole new level! She now enjoys places like the Children's Discovery Museum because she can intereact.

Finally, December. Anna filled our Advent season and Christmastime with complete joy. We are so blessed to have her in our lives and we thank God for her each and every day. This month we had our dear friends come visit and seeing Anna, Matthias, and Theodore together was absolutely beautiful. We had many different Christmas celebrations, enjoying our time with family. Unfortunately 2011 went out with the stomach flu for all of us. First Anna, then the next day, Jeremy and finally myself today. So despite our not so fun New Year's this year, we know how much we have to be thankful for and we look forward to seeing what 2012 has in store for us. Hopefully another adoption :-)!!!

This is how Anna plays peek-a-boo. She covers her ears instead of her eyes. We're not sure why, but boy is it cute!

Anna and daddy enjoying Anna's "laptop" that she got for Christmas.

Anna and daddy enjoying the ISU game we went to yesterday! Anna even got one of the balls they threw out and she enjoyed playing with it the whole game!

7 Quick Takes (9)

2011-12-30T10:19:00.002-06:00

--- 1 ---

At 10 months old, Anna is finally getting a tooth! We can see it, it just needs to finally pop through the gums!

--- 2 ---

Christmas was so much fun this year. Here are some pictures of Anna and the craziness! We had seven different Christmas celebrations in just 3 days. It was busy, but seeing all our families and sharing Christmas with people we love was priceless. Anna loved every minute of it!

She can find a mirror anywhere. She just loves watching herself dance!

Anna and her second cousin Jacob. He's like 3 months older than her, but they're pretty much the same size!

Anna riding in style in her first vehicle! Nana and Papa got her this super fancy pick-up truck, it even has a tailgate that opens with cup holders...

Fun with paper. She didn't care what was in the presents, so long as we let her have some paper. She started grabbing paper and running away at one point. Here she's opening up the princess tent her Aunt Sara and Uncle Kel got her!

She's such a ham for the camera!

Walking around with her jingle bell!

--- 3 ---

I mentioned that our good friends were coming to stay a few days before Christmas. Here's the three of us moms with our babies. What a beautiful blessing to have three beautiful, happy and adorable babies this year!

Justine and Theodore, Myself and Anna, Stephanie and Matthias

--- 4 ---

We're writing our check for our second Homestudy next week! I'm excited to get moving! Thank you end-of-the-year bonus!

--- 5 ---

We hung out at our friends house before Christmas. They have three girls (4, 3, 18 mo) and Anna just LOVES them! We're lucky we get to see them so often, because Anna and Anne sure have fun together.

Anna teaching Anne how to properly lick windows... So glad my daughter is teaching other kids good habits...

Oh, and now that we've had fun licking the windows, let's ~~lick~~ kiss each other!

--- 6 ---

Every room in our house looks like a toy store exploded... And while I generally like things neat and tidy and picked up, seeing all these little girl toys strewn about the house makes me so very happy. I'll keep the mess :-)

--- 7 ---

Since I had the week off, I decided to take the week off of cleaning the house too (that and we spent very little time actually at home in the last week)... I have my work cut out for me on Monday!

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

10 Months Old

2011-12-28T20:08:00.001-06:00

Anna is 10 months old today! I know I say it every month but why does she have to get so big so fast?

Here are some of the things she's been up to the last month:

Walking: She mastered the walking thing. Just a few days after turning 9 months old, she had it down. Now she very rarely crawls and prefers walking. She falls about a billion times a day because she just doesn't care what is in her way, she'll walk over it! It's fun to have her walking, she follows me everywhere and looks like such a big girl!

Talking: She still talks ALL. THE. TIME! On our various trips for different Christmas gatherings, she pretty much yaked the whole time. Like an entire 2.5 hour car trip... And she's loud! She says Mama, Dada, more, Gigi (her giraffe), and no, no, no. Sometimes we think she says "hi" and "all done" but it's hit or miss so we're not sure :-)

Toys: She got a Bitty Baby for Christmas from her grandparents and absolutely loves it. It's really sweet because she mimics what I do. She's always picking it up and giving the baby hugs and kisses and sometime she'll pick it up and pat it's back. It's so sweet!

She got like a billion toys for Christmas so she's had fun playing with all of those. She loves the bongo drums her uncles got her because she just loves to dance.

She also of course still loves giraffe. She's started calling it Gigi like I mentioned before. She takes it everywhere and it's looking ~~nasty~~ loved.

Bathtime: She still loves bathtime, but had a few days there where she hated it. We think it's because we got her a whale bath toy to play with, it makes noise and shoots water. She's deathly afraid of it. And a few days after that, she acted scared of the tub. But the whale is in hiding and she's back to her normal splashing self. She also has those foam bath letters that stick to the side of the tub. She will only play with the green ones. What's with that? She will pick up say a red one, look at it, and chuck it to the side and repeat until she finds a green one. Then she chews on it. It's kinda strange but very funny at the same time.

Other than that, there's not much new, walking was the big thing this month. We're hoping she slows down her growing a little bit, at her last appt. she was 90 percentile in height and weight. Just this week she's fitting into some of her 12M and lots of her 18M clothes. With a new 18M wardrobe from Christmas she's styling :-) She's looking (and acting) like a toddler. Where did my little baby go? She's just so much fun and so sweet.

She also went to her first Illini game last night. That may be a post in itself, but I will say she absolutely loved it. 16,000 people might overwhelm most 10 month olds, but not this child. She likes an audience!

And again, I repeat myself month after month, but we feel so blessed to have her as our daughter. She is so full of craziness and is just has such a fun personality. While she definitely has an attitude at times, most of the time she is happy, crazy, and full of sweetness!

Merry Christmas

2011-12-27T15:13:00.000-06:00

At some point I'll get around to posting some pictures but for now, I'll just say that every room in our house now looks like a toy store exploded.

I guess that's what you get when you have the first grandbaby on both sides, 8 aunts and uncles, four sets of great grandparents, and a billion people who love you and want to shower you with gifts on your first Christmas :-)!

We feel so blessed to be able to have spent so much time with our wonderful families and friends this Christmas. We're so thankful for Anna this Christmas.

We're thankful that my whole family got to go to Mass together at my the parish we grew up in and we FILLED a pew. It's been a quite a few years since schedules allowed us to all share a pew together! It was most definitely the highlight of our Christmas. With Anna asleep in her new carrier, and family surrounding us, it was so peaceful to sit in a quiet pew staring at the baby in the manger listening to the choir since joyful Christmas songs. It brought tears to my eyes to have my own baby snuggled up on my chest and understanding the joy Mary must have felt.

Sentiment

2011-12-21T21:49:00.001-06:00

This evening we decided to rearrange our two spare bedrooms. It's actually kind of been a week-long process of going through stuff. We wanted to clear out Anna's future bedroom to make room for a pretty little girl when the time is right. Basically we had kept a lot of our things in there that we didn't really know what to do with. So with going through things came some discussions about what to keep and what not to.

My hubby and I are very alike in so many ways. I could list them, but it would take a while. We're also very different in many ways. It keeps our marriage interesting and well-balanced.

One of those differences comes in sentiment. I am 100% NOT sentimental. Objects just really have no emotional attachment for me. Maybe it's because I have a very sharp, clear memory and I don't feel like I need a thing to remind me? I do love pictures (if you couldn't tell by the thousands I post of Anna) and those are sentimental to me. Basically, I have no problem getting rid of just about anything. I am whatever the opposite of a pack rat is. I get rid of EVERYTHING!

Basically my selection process is: If I don't remember where it came from upon first glace, or if I didn't know that teddy bear from long ago was in drawer I just found it in, I obviously didn't miss it and clearly don't need it. So out with it!

Jeremy is very different. While I wouldn't classify his as a pack rat by any means, he is definitely more emotionally attached to objects that bring memories. He's likely to pick up that same teddy bear that I would thrown away and describe a memory that goes with it. I would be likely to describe the memory with no recollection that a teddy bear was involved. See the difference?

So through the years we've learned to respect each other's sentiment while still making sure the things we kept actually had sentimental value and the things we got rid of were definitely ready to get cut. This week was one of those times. We had fun sharing memories and we had fun laughing at the ridiculousness of some of the things we kept.

It used to be a source of tension when we went through things. However, together, we've both come a long way at meeting in the middle. And after an evening of going through things, it dawned on me how much we've grown together. We've definitely met in the middle!

Updates

2011-12-20T09:35:00.002-06:00

We had Anna make her own Advent wreath. She obviously doesn't understand Advent yet, but she had fun making it!

We have an children's Advent Activity book and one day the activity was to make an angel ornament.

Our good friends came home for Christmas. We hadn't met their son Matthias yet, he was born in September (on my birthday!) after they moved to Pennsylvania. So here are the birthday buddies :-)

Anna got her first drum lesson from her Uncle Joey :-). She was watching intently!

Anna loves presents. But she doesn't know they're supposed to be opened yet. So instead she enjoys pushing them around...

And since she's walking now, carrying them around...

Oh what fun it is to crawl under the tree...

And here's a picture of Anna with her first pigtails. Her curls are now long enough to get into pony tails. I still have quite a bit of practicing to do to make them look nice, but looking at her face, you can tell she thought they looked pretty cute!

And in just two days, our friends Jon and Justine and their son Theodore (our godson), as well as our friends David and Stephanie and their son Matthias are staying with us for our 3rd annual New Year's party. I know, it's not New Year's yet, but we had to do it when everyone was in town. But since Advent is the Church's New Year, it works, right?

Anyway, last year at our New Year's party, the three of us women spent a lot of time talking about infertility and the struggles, as we were all in similar boats. Little did we know at the time, but God had three very special babies for us. Stephanie found out she was pregnant very soon after that. And Justine a month later. And we got Anna a month later! So by March, all three of us had babies either in the womb or in our arms. What a wonderful blessing to be able to celebrate the end of a fantastic year and the birth of our Lord with such great friends and their beautiful babies!

Words cannot express how blessed we feel to have Anna this Christmas. We cannot wait to celebrate with an abundance of family and friends! And we especially remember Anna's birthmom and keep her close in our prayers and thank God for her each day. I'm sure this time of year will be challenging for her and I cannot express enough how much love we have for her.

Hide-n-seek Nativity

2011-12-14T16:38:00.002-06:00

Now you see it...

now you don't!

"Ta-da!"

It's no wonder when we can't find something the first place we look is under the couch! :-)

And here's a close-up of Anna's first shiner. She nailed the corner of the piano bench, conveniently the night before our case worker came over...

On Santa

2011-12-14T06:00:00.000-06:00

I've come to realize that a major part of raising children is deciding what will and will not be a part of our home. Making decisions about traditions and what they will and will not look like is hard, this time of year especially. Although we had thought through many things before we were parents, a lot was discussed on a "We'll think about that when we get there" basis.

Well now we're there and the topic of Santa needed to be discussed. Would we include Santa in our Chritmas festivities?

***And let me just say now, many families I know do traditions of all kinds very differently. I am NOT saying one way is better, but merely what will work best for OUR family. I refuse to judge others, especially parents, on parenting decisions of any kind. I do not want to be judged for my decisions and therefore do not judge others on theirs. We all, as parents, are trying to do what is best for OUR families, and that looks different in every family.***

We have been asked countless times already, "So has Anna had her picture taken with Santa yet?" I guess I didn't realize just how big of a deal it was until this year.

So here's what we decided. We will treat Santa like the fictional character that he is. Similar to say, Cinderella or the Smurfs. We do, and will, read stories about him, acknowleging the works of fiction, as we would Harry Potter or any other fictional character.

We will also talk about where the idea for Santa came from. From the holy bishop, St. Nicholas. We will celebrate his feast day on December 6 with small gifts in our shoes and giving a gift to charity as a family, as St. Nicholas would have done.

You see, I don't really have a problem with Santa, especially since his roots are in a holy man who spent his life giving to the poor. I do, however, have a problem with the publicity he is given. He becomes a celebrity at Christmas time. Taking all of the focus off of Christ's birth, and instead putting the focus on a jolly elf who sneaks down the chimney at night to bestow upon children mass amounts of gifts.

I want Christmas morning to have the same "magic" that children often express about Santa, but instead of the "magic" of Santa, feeling the "magic" or sheer joy in the birth of our Lord. I want Christmas morning to be about Christ. Not anything else. WE will get our children gifts for Christmas because that is a way of celebrating the wonderfulness of Jesus' birthday. We will bake and set out a cookie or treat to be eaten on Christmas morning by US to celebrate. We will read the Christmas narrative before opening gifts. Santa does not need to be a part of that.

That is how I want Christmas to look in our home.

I want the anticipation of Christmas morning to be about a birthday. The most important birthday. Because the reality is that we have not been decorating the house... and reading our Jesse tree verses... and lighting our Advent candles... and singing O Come O Come Emmanuel... and attending Christmas parties... and wrapping gifts... for a fictional character. But rather for a very real, and very important baby who saved the world from sin, suffered on a cross for us, and rose from the dead.

Journey to Adoption #2

2011-12-12T06:00:00.000-06:00

I've mentioned a few times about our beginning of the journey to Adoption #2. I mentioned meeting with our case worker.

Well, we met with our case worker and are just so excited to begin. At teh first of the year, we'll begin our second homestudy. We'll go back through all of our paperwork, editting where needed. Luckily, we did the paperwork the first time not that long ago, so not much will need editting. We will them redo/revise our profile. We will also do another video.

Our caseworker said that we could be back into circulation very early next year. That makes me SO HAPPY!

The first time around, it took about 3 months for our Homestudy to be approved (this is after we had done everything WE needed to do), our licensing to go through, and our profile to go into circulation. Thinking timeline for #2, I was hoping it would be shorter.

Our caseworker confirmed that. Our license is still valid, check. Our Homestudy was approved the first time and because we're quite involved and attend all of the functions Catholic Charities puts on, the director of CC knows us well. This means that getting our second Homestudy approved is no big deal, they already know us and don't need to start fresh, check. The birthmom counselors already know us (because our profile was shown to a lot of birthmoms the first time) so going into circulation is so much faster the second time around, check.

The process is much easier, less time intensive, and much easier this time around. That makes me SO HAPPY!

In addition, there are A LOT of birthmoms right now. In fact, our caseworker almost called us to ask us come up with a profile quick last week to show a birthmom because we fit her qualifications perfectly, despite not yet being homestudy approved. They found a few other families though, and although bm hasn't picked anyone yet, she's pretty sure they will. But that's great, our caseworker already wants our profile out there.

Due to our openness, we fit a lot of birthmoms' criteria. We also have a child of a minority race already in our home, making us more appealing to birthmoms of a minority race because we're already "walking that walk" as our case worker put it. The bms can then feel confident that we'll welcome any child with open arms, and boy would they be right :-).

All of this makes me hopeful for a quick wait time. But at the same time, I'm realistic. I know it could be a long time, it could be years. And in reality, I'm okay with that. I'm in a different place than I was alast year, waiting the first time. We have Anna. And I'm confident that God has a plan and that His plan is best. I KNOW that I will survive through a fallthrough. I KNOW that God will bless us with another child if that is His plan. And I KNOW that through it all, I can stare at my beautiful baby girl and confirm God's love for me. This time around, I have hope, something I didn't always have last time. I have peace. I have joy. And I have willingly given up control.

The thought of adding another child to our family makes me giddy with excitement. I LOVE being a mom and I can't wait to see the plans God has for us.

On a less happy note, please say an extra prayer for the birthmom we were matched with first (our fallthrough). Our caseworker gives us updates on her once in a while and we received some sad news about her situation. Please pray for her and her children. I truly believe God put her in our lives for a reason and right now that reason is to offer prayers.

Castles... In Scotland

2011-12-09T23:44:00.001-06:00

We had Jeremy's work Christmas party tonight. Things like this really aren't my scene. I despise small talk. I don't "mingle" well... I'm awkward and don't like to start conversations with people I don't know. Did I mention that I'm awkward?

Tonight, however, turned out rather nice. Funny, in fact.

Our table was very chatty, the perfect outlet for me to respond politely to questions but not have to initiate conversation.

When discussing their son's upcoming wedding (in Scotland, yes, the country), one of Jeremy's co-workers said, "It should be fun, we rented a castle for the week."

I could hardly stifle my giggles. Who has enough money to rent a castle? Let alone for a week? Not a hotel room, a condo, a house even, but a castle? In Scotland?

7 Quick Takes (8)

2011-12-09T09:26:00.001-06:00

--- 1 ---

Anna's trying to be like her mommy and overachieve... Yup, she hit 90th percentile for both height and weight! At 21 lbs and 29 in., she's getting all A's! We had her 9 month well check yesterday and her doctor was surprised when she saw Anna walking around the room. And equally impressed when she asked if Anna has tried a sippy cup yet and I informed her that she in fact loves her sippy cup and has totally given up her bottle for a cup (Anna made it very clear this week that she does NOT want that silly bottle, but definitely wants her formula out of a cup)!

Okay, maybe that sounds braggy, but I'm just a mama proud of her baby girl :-) And so very happy to have a baby girl to be proud of!

--- 2 ---

And to continue my proud mama moments, this morning Anna figured out how to stand up without the use of furniture or anything, just in the middle of the floor. She's been trying for a while and finally figured it out this morning!

--- 3 ---

We meet with our caseworker this afternoon to start the process for Adoption #2! I'm really excited!

--- 4 ---

Anna is like deathly afriad of people sneezing! What is with that? If we sneeze, she screams... I don't know how to avoid it, it's kind of a weird fear to have!

--- 5 ---

I feel so blessed to be surrounded by such wonderful Catholic moms. Who, feast days/solemnities like yesterday, always get together to celebrate. We went to McD's yesterday and let the kiddos play. Anna and Luke love keeping up with the big kids, they're fun to watch! I love being surrounded by friends who have the same beliefs and values that we do!

--- 6 ---

My youngest sister turns 20 this weekend. That makes me feel incredibly old. I don't so much notice that I'm getting older, I feel the same on my birthdays as I did before, not older. But when my younger siblings turn "old" ages? That's a totally different story! Happy Birthday Baby Sis aka Aunt Julie!

--- 7 ---

Well, #7 was going to be a few cute videos, but they don't want to load again, so I'll just say Happy Friday and I hope everyone has fantastic weekends!

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

Snow!

2011-12-06T13:25:00.001-06:00

Actually, this post has nothing to do with snow, but I just noticed it's snowing outside! Yay for the first snow, I hope we get enough to cover the ground! Somehow I doubt it, it's not coming down very hard :-).

Here are a few pictures to sum up our week so far!

Anna thoroughly enjoyed dinner last night! After cooking a chicken, I decided to make bbq chicken sandwiches for dinner. She ate half of a sandwich all by herself with sweet potatoes! And she LOVED it! There's nothing this kid won't eat!

We baked Christmas cookies for our RCIA party tonight! Anna enjoyed the cookie cutters.

We ended up with very few stocking cookies because once she got a hold of the cookie cutter, we weren't getting it back without a fight and a lot of slobber :-)

And to top off her bbq chicken dinner... A cookie and some sprinkles! Who knew a container of sprinkles would provide so much entertainment?

Other than that, we celebrated St. Nicholas' Feast Day today with a St. Nick video and we even ate snack downstairs during the movie. We're also enjoying lots of dancing to some Christmas music. Anna's really into dancing lately, it's so adorable and I have a cute video, but blogger won't let me upload it for some reason. So anyway, picture the most adorable 9 month old ever bouncing up and down on her knees and waving her arms in the air. Throw a clap or two in there and some head shakes and you have insane cuteness!

And this week she's really taken off walking very well. She doesn't go too far yet, but she definitely walks! Her only problem is that she wants to go way faster than her little uncoordinated legs will let her. Thank goodness she's tough, she falls a billion times a day, gets back up, and keeps going! She'll have it down pat here in a few days I'm sure!

7 Quick Takes (7)

2011-12-01T23:22:00.000-06:00

--- 1 ---

December's calendar is quickly filling up! I'm so excited to see some friends who are coming into town! We have lots of dates set for Christmas gatherings and such. I always love spending so much time with friends and family in December.

--- 2 ---

Anna loves the Christmas tree. The lights, the ornaments, the presents under it, everything! Her favorite thing is to get the big present (hers, and she actually already plays with the toy, we wrapped up the empty box) and she pushes it around like a walker. It's pretty cute!

--- 3 ---

I broke my favorite Mary plate yesterday. It was a gift and it was beautiful. We had it sitting on Anna's bookshelf in her room. It was a constant reminder of how I was supposed to be as a mother. And I broke it... sad...

--- 4 ---

Speaking of breaking things, I have quite the track record. I broke two pieces to a nativity set that we have. Luckily I was able to hot glue them back together. We then noticed that we had a nativity in every room except for Anna's. And then Jeremy reminded me that we DID have on in there at one point. And that I had broken it... It was on the same shelf as the Mary plate. Maybe that shelf isn't a good place for breakables!

--- 5 ---

I finally found some stuff that makes Anna's curls soft and defined instead of frizzy and knotty! I wish I would have bought it a long time ago, but I wanted to do my research first before I spent what seemed like a lot of money on hair stuff. Now that I've used the products, I can't believe I waited so long! Here's what I got and love! I just can't believe how soft and moisturized her hair looks and feels now! And I was able to comb it all the way out with no tears! Worth it, right there!

(This is just my opinion on this product, I was not asked to write a "review", I simply wanted to share my good news :-)

--- 6 ---

Anna thinks she's a big kid. When we got family pictures taken last week, there was a lego table in the waiting area. It was surrounded by 2,3,and 4 year olds. When I put her down, she waltzed right up there made a place for herself and took another kid's legos (the kid didn't care thankfully). We couldn't stop laughing at the way she fit in with the "big" kids. And Wed. we went to McD's with some friends and she acted like she owned the place. She tried climbing into the tubes and standing on the slide and running after the other kids. She doesn't care if she gets knocked over or pushed or anything. She just wants to be big!

--- 7 ---

I won a Liebster Award from G @ Renewing Moments! Thanks G!

The Liebster Award spotlights up and coming bloggers who generally have less than 200 followers.

I have awarded my Liebster Blog Awards to 5 bloggers who I am constantly inspired by in their adoption journeys: (and I don't know who has already gotten it, so sorry if I repeat!)

1. Pray, Hope, Don't Worry
2. Grace in my Heart
3. Patiently Waiting
4. All You Who Hope
5. Magnify the Lord With Me
Upon receipt of the Liebster Blog Award, there are a few very simple rules:
1. Copy and paste the award on your blog
2. Thank the giver and link back to the blogger who gave it to you
3. Reveal your top 5 picks and let them know by leaving a comment on their blog or emailing them.
4. Hope that your followers will spread the love to other bloggers.

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

A new agency

2011-11-29T09:45:00.001-06:00

I wrote this post back in July when Illinois passed it's Civi.l Un.ion Act (CUA as I'll call it here). Well, recent events have made what I feared in that post a reality.

We live in one of the diocese that was fighting for Catholic Charities (CC) in Illinois. They were fighting to have the Religious Freedom Act trump the CUA with regards to faith based organizations abiding by their own moral values. The state, however, felt that the CUA was more important and CC had to either abide by their ruling that same sex or cohabitating couples could be a part of their foster care and/or adoption programs or close their doors. They would no longer be allowed to refer these couples to other agencies.

So with much prayer and a great deal of reluctance, the bishop of our diocese had no choice but to have CC stop its adoption and foster care programs. However, the bishop and executive team at CC have worked very hard to create a plan that will not disrupt any of the children being served or any of the families in the foster care and/or adoption process.

Basically the executive team formed a new organization. This organization called The Center For Youth and Family Solutions (CYFS) has been formed. The executive team from CC is now running this new organization. It is in no way funded or connected to the Catholic Church, so it can function within state guidelines and continue to provide care.

The staff from CC is being rehired at this new orgaization. Records from CC are all being moved. The children in the foster care programs will not even feel the switch. Families may have a little paperwork but they're making that as minimal as possible. Fee structures are changing a little, but it's all for the better.

I'm glad they had a plan. It puts me at ease knowing that the case workers who have operated under a moral code for so long are going to be the same ones we continue to work with.

Yes, they will have to start accepting civil unions in addition to marriages and single people. And our case worker addressed us specifically to see our thoughts on this. We took it to prayer and really had to think about our options.

The reality is that we live in a state that is failing financially and morally. It was recent news that our state is #49 when ranked as far as finances are concerned.  Only California is worse than our current financial situation. It's also a reality that unfortunately Illinois is paving the way for many of these civil liberty laws that are extremely contrary to our Catholic faith.

With those realities in mind, we know that God is calling us to adopt again. And to possibly foster down the road. He's made that very clear through prayer. So although this new agency (CYFS) will have to abide by our state's laws, we will stay with them. There is nowhere else to go, and we're not moving to a different state. I know that the caseworkers are struggling more than we are.  CC in our diocese operated with the guidance of the Catholic Church for over 100 years. At least those principles (especially the Right to Life attitude) are still instilled in our caseworkers. I'm confident that they will continue to respect life at all costs and do what is best for the children.

It just saddens me that a religious organization had their freedom of religion taken away. It's sad that a country built on religious freedom is now taking those very freedoms away. It takes away some of my hope in the coming generations. It makes it more challenging to raise holy children who look to the Church for guidance.

That was much longer than I intended it to be, but for family and friends, it's important to know as this will all be hitting the news in the near future. We will be beginning the process to adopt again here shortly and we will begin with the new agency (CYFS). Please pray for all of those affected by this situation and for our upcoming adoption journey #2.

9 Months Old

2011-11-28T13:27:00.001-06:00

Anna is 9 months old today! Time just flies! She is doing all kinds of fun stuff!

Walking:
She started taking steps in the last week or so. She started by just letting go of things and taking a step or two. But she decided that wasn't good enough and has been walking 7+ steps and going a few feet before falling! Usually it's a toy in the way, or excitement that causes her to fall. I have no doubt that she will be full fledged walking here very soon! She also learned to climb the stairs and is quite fast and very good at it. We have the stairs gated, but when we're taking her upstairs, we let her do it herself and follow behind to make sure she doesn't fall.

Eating:
She pretty much eatswhaever we eat now. She loves cheese and all fruits. She is picky about veggies, but we've decided it's not the taste she's picky about, but more like what form they come in. For instance, if sweet potatoes are mashed, she refuses them. But if they're cut fry style or cut into cubes, she'll gobble them up. Same goes for all veggies for the most part. She just wants to be independent! She also won't eat anything off of a baby spoon, we have to use a real spoon... She definitely lets her opinion be known!

Bottles/cups:
We'd cut her down to just 4 5oz bottles a month ago, and we're starting to wean her off the bottle now. She really doesn't care how it gets in her mouth, she just enjoys her few moments of formula. So I've replaced two of her bottles with sippy cups of formula. She's doing great with that! She also loves her sippy cups! She probably drinks about 20 oz of water a day from her cups. I don't know if it's cause she talks so much or what, but she's always thirsty! And thankfully, water is her drink of choice!

Talking:
Well, she does it, ALL. THE. TIME! She's saying a lot of consonants now and continues to say Mama and Dada. She now says "Mo" when she wants more and she also signs it now too. She's started fake laughing recently and will throw herself back and pretend to laugh until it becomes so funny she actually starts laughing. It's pretty cute and quite hilarious.

Clapping:
She's started clapping in the last few weeks. She tried really hard to do it before, but couldn't get the coordination down. She's very good at it now and regularlly claps for herself.

Kisses:
She does a smacking noise now when she wants a kiss. And she blows kisses, just not from her mouth yet. She puts her hand to my mouth, makes the noise herself and takes her hand away. I don't know if she thinks its funnier that way, but she won't do it to her own mouth!

Sleeping:
She's still a fantastic sleeper, going down about 7:30 at night and getting up between 6:30-7. She had a week there where she thought it was fun to get up at like 5:30, but that seems to have stopped thank goodness! Luckily when she wakes up, she almost always just plays in her bed happily. She talks and plays with her giraffe until we come get her. I'm so thankful for my great sleeper :-)!

Ta-Da!:
Okay, I saved my favorite for last. She now sticks her hands in the air and says "Du-Da!" And she expects us to say it as well. It must be something I do a lot... So now we can ask her to say "Ta-da!" and she'll perform for us. She likes to do it after she walks or stands or does something funny. It's adorable!

Here's her mandatory 9 Month picture!

The rest of these are one we had taken. Our Christmas gift to our parents was organizing a time to get our whole family picture taken. So we took some with Jeremy's family one day and mine another. And the cool thing is that they take all kinds of groupings, including ones of just Anna! And we were given the CD and the rights to post the pictures online (just not to print them anywhere except where we got them taken).

Jeremy's family: (back) Nana and Papa, (front) Uncle Joey, Uncle Jason, Daddy, Anna, and Mom

My family: (back) Aunt Julie, Daddy, Mom, Aunt Lisa (front) Grandpa, Grandma, Anna, Aunt Sara and Uncle Kel

And this one is my favorite. It just totally captures Anna!

Late Night Freak-Out

2011-11-23T23:24:00.001-06:00

As I'm innocently checking my email (and yes, it's way too late to be checking email, but I was wasting time waiting for the cloth diaper laundry to be ready to rotate), the hubby is taking out the trash. And then ever-so-kindly rotates laundry for me before I can get there.

And then, Jeremy, in shorts only (and its cold outside), says "I'll be in the garage...".

I pause, scratch my head, and obviously said, "Why?"

"Oh, you know, because there's a mouse..."

Pause and cue the freak-out!

So he tells me that when he took out the trash, he noticed a mouse behind the trash can, in the garage.

I then, obviously, realized that if there's a mouse in the garage, there are probably 15 more in the house... and I ended with something along the lines of waking up the baby and packing my stuff and staying at my parents while Jeremy mumbled, "I knew I shouldn't have told you."

He said I was overreacting and that it was just one little mouse, who was seeking warmth in the cold and he was going to shoo it outside (in his shorts, mind you).

And then I said something to the effect of if I find mouse droppings tomorrow, I'm not coming home for a week...

And he slipped out the door while I watched intently to make sure the sneaky mouse didn't run in as soon as the door cracked.

So there's my mouse story for tonight. Oh, and the end? I don't know yet, he's still out there shooing... And I'm still inside, freaking out!

I don't do mice. Period.

Videos

2011-11-22T16:26:00.001-06:00

Well, since I don't have a whole lot of time to write a post with lots of family in town :-) I'll just post some recent videos instead!

The first one is of Anna helping daddy load the dishwasher. The second she hears it open, she bolts for it and will not leave until it's closed. Sometimes if we turn away for a second, we'll catch her stnding IN the dishwasher... Don't worry, no dishes or children were harmed in the making this video :-).

This one is of her walking with her walker. It also catches her standing by herself (a very regular occurence around here lately) and clapping for herself, something she just started doing!

She's started taking a few steps there and there by herself. This one catches a few quick ones before a wipeout! We joke that her alignment is a little to the left... And she doesn't care what's in front of her, she's a bulldozer!

7 Quick Takes (6)

2011-11-18T09:49:00.001-06:00

Thanksgiving is a beautiful time of year and one of my favorite holidays. I have so much to be thankful for and I don't want to ever take it for granted! So here are my Quick Takes:

Thankful Style

--- 1 ---

My wonderful husband who unloaded the dishwasher and folded the laundry this morning before I ever got out of bed just so I could spend more time snuggling with my baby girl. And who is always thoughtful and always selfless. I couldn't ask for a better husband. I am so blessed to be married to such a wonderful, strong, hardworking, sensitive, sweet, kind, loving, caring, serving man. And seeing him as a daddy has melted my heart and makes me love him even more (if that's possible :-)!

--- 2 ---

My dear sweet Anna. She is just such a joy in our lives, she's everything to us! I can't imagine our lives without her. She is so fun and full of energy. I love the way she crawls up to me, grabs my face, and plants a big wet kiss on my mouth. And the way she crawls up to daddy just to give him a hug. And the way she manages to give a beautiful smile, just when you need it. And the way she plays with my hair when she's falling asleep. And the way she giggles when I play peek-a-boo with her and lights up when I walk in the room. I could go on and on and on... I am so blessed to be her mama.

--- 3 ---

Anna's birthmom who gave us everything. I can't help but feel sad for her when I think about how joyful we are to have our daughter this year for the holidays and how much I know it will hurt for her. My prayers are always with her and I can't express my gratitude for the selfless gift she gave to sweet Anna. And I'm overall thankful for the gift of adoption. Both as an option for birthmoms who want to make the best choice for their babies and for couples like us who choose to grow our families in this way.

--- 4 ---

Our extended families. We're so blessed to live in the same town as both of our parents and all of our sibilings (other than the two away at college, but this is till homebase for them). They're so supportive, loving, and caring. We love spending time with both families and we're so glad Anna gets to spend so much time with her grandparents, aunts and uncles.

--- 5 ---

The gift of marriage and the wonderful example of our families in this holy sacrament. I'm thankful for my grandparents (almost) 60 years of marriage. Jeremy's grandparents who had been married for 60+ years when his grandma died. My other grandparents who had been married for 50+ years when my grandpa died. My parents 27 years of marriage. Jeremy's parents 28 years of marriage. Our 3 years of marriage. We are so blessed to come from such wonderful examples and to be able to raise Anna in that environment.

--- 6 ---

Awesome friends. I feel so blessed to be surrounded by so many fantastic friends. Especially for the Catholic moms that we hang out with a few times every week. They're wonderful people and since most of them have 3+ children, it's great to be able to learn from them. I can always get advice and ideas from them as well as share joys and frustrations. I'm thankful they're so accepting and that all of their kids are so wonderful. I'm glad Anna will grow up with these kids and have so many wonderful, holy friends as well.

--- 7 ---

My home sweet home. I'm thankful I have somewhere to live and that God has blessed us with my dream home. I'm thankful for cozy neighborhood we live in and teh neighbors that surround us. We are so grateful that we had the opportunity to afford this home and have room to adopt lots more children :-)!

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

Distinguished Title

2011-11-16T16:55:00.001-06:00

Jeremy had a chili lunch today at work. They always request that he bring brownies (not just for special lunches, but he often gets requests a few times a week). I always offer to make something different, I love to bake and have many yummy recipes... and they always insist on brownies.

So when I picked Jeremy up from work today, he handed me the sign that sat in front of my brownies for lunch (even though at that point there were only 5 left, they'd all been eaten BEFORE lunch...).

It says "BEST BROWNIES EVER! (rated by a brownie addict.)"

I guess I know why they always request brownies... if it isn't broke, don't fix it!

I'm so glad I have such a distinguished title around his workplace... I'm glad that my hard work and effort (brownies from a box with powdered sugar on top) was so greatly appreeciated! (And there is some skill involved, a special pan, different temp and different cooking time than the box calls for, they're perfect every time!)

Our weekend in pictures

2011-11-15T10:30:00.001-06:00

Anna thorougly enjoyed the hotel pool! She just loves the water!

She most enjoyed the stairs because she could stand by herself.

We went on a picnic at Starved Rock. Anna was fascinated by the giant leaves!

And the cardboard box...

Time with daddy!

Time with mommy!

Family picture

Playing in the hotel room when a certain someone decided to wake up way too early :-)

Anna and her caseworker

Our family and the foster family that took care of her before we got her! This was at the National Adoption Month Potluck.

Anna and Katie had a blast playing together. Since Anna didn't have a name when they got her, they just give the babies a name until they go to their adoptive families. Katie and her friends combined all of their names to create Anna's name. It was "Angelicity" while she was with them and they called her Angie for short.

Anna and her buddy Jim, she was one of his favorite babies that they've had, and they've now had 25. Anna was number 21. They had Anna longer than they usually have the babies, and she was such a good baby that they became very attached. He was so delighted to see her and spend time with us!

The Right Mass

2011-11-13T06:30:00.001-06:00

So this weekend we've been staying in a town about an hour from where we live. We have an Adoption picnic close by today and we had two free hotel rooms to use by December. So we made a weekend out of it!

We have enjoyed swimming in the pool, picnicking at Starved Rock, accidentally happening upon an eagle release at Starved Rock, and just bummin around the hotel room. It has been extremly relaxing and even though Anna thinks that when we're away from home she need to get up at the crack of dawn, it's been fun to spend family time, even at 5 in the mornin :-).

Yesterday we decided to go to Mass so that this morning we could get all packed and ready and be out by check-out time without rushing too much. We had four churches to choose from and a few different times. Basically we decided based on when Anna wok upfrom her nap. So we decided 4:30 at St. Patrick's.

When we drove up, we saw J, D, and K, the newborn foster family that took care of Anna for 5 days before they brought her to us! They were walking in to church. We parked and walked in and after seeing us, they motioned for us to sit with them (they were in the cry room, they had another baby this weekend whose adoptive parents will pick him up Monday or Tuesday after surrenders are signed!) We knew we'd see them at the picnic but had no idea that they were even Catholic, let alone attended this Church and came to this Mass! We really did pick the right Mass! I thanked God over and over again for the wonderful people who cared for my daughter when I couldn't.

They loved watching Anna be her crazy self during Mass, they rarely get to see the babies they've cared for after they've been adopted. They love seeing her, they still claim she was thir favorite baby, and the best one they've had. Even their 11 year old daughter said that! They just couldn't get over how busy and chatty she was! And how big she's gotten since they saw her last! We email them updates, but it's not the same as seeing her in person!

They then invited us to pizza with them and we sat and chatted for a long time. They're wonderful people and we're so glad we ran into them at Mass. They enjoyed hearing her whole story as they aren't given much information when they get a baby. Anna's story is much like the one of their daughter who they got on February 28 (Anna's birthday) 11 years ago. They were so grateful for the opportunity to see Anna. And the best part! We get to see them again today! Hopefully we'll remember to take a picture of all of us.

7 Quick Takes (5)

2011-11-11T14:36:00.001-06:00

--- 1 ---

We had one sick little girly around our house this week. She had a double ear infection and it caused a high fever (103+) and had her down and out for like 3 days. I HATE to see my baby sick. She was pitiful and I wanted to make it better. She's been fever free for two days now and is back to her usual self!

--- 2 ---

Jeremy took his Actuary exam this week. We really hope he passed it this time!

--- 3 ---

After his exam, Jer raked leaves for hours last night. The pile spans the entire width of our lot and is almost 4 feet high! We put the neighbors' piles to shame :-)

--- 4 ---

My aunt got married today! Congratulations Aunt Sharon and Uncle Bobby! 11-11-11, fun date for a wedding! And I'm a little jealous of my parents who went to Florida for the wedding. They keep posting beach pictures and its cold and yucky here!

--- 5 ---

I'm excited for the National Adoption Month Potluck for Catholic Charities in our Diocese this weekend! I love it when we get the chance to celebrate adoption!

--- 6 ---

For the Adoptin Potluck, we were asked to make some kind of visual telling of our adoption story. It reminded me (although I've thought about it a lot lately) that a year ago next week was when we were first identified by a birthmom. She then decided to parent when the baby was born in February but a lot has happened in a year! I find it really neat to be able to go back and read the emotions and events going on at that point. I'm so glad I have this blog as documentation of what we went through, good and bad!

--- 7 ---

Wow, being cooped up in the house all week sure makes for boring (and hard to come up with) Quick Takes!

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

Thankful

2011-11-08T09:44:00.002-06:00

Well, besides the most important, my wonderful husband, my beautiful daughter, our loving families, our perfect home, etc... I'll get to that post closer to thanksgiving :-)

Today I am most thankful for:

1) My motherly instinct that had me rushing an all-of-the-sudden lethargic, unenergetic, feverish Anna to the doctor last night to discover a double ear infection.

2) My Bumg.enius 4.0 cloth diapers. Because of those ear infections and the antibiotics Anna is now on, she had the world's biggest stinky diaper today. And that wonderful diaper kept it all contained... In fact, I didn't even smell it or know it was there until I went to change her before naptime! They're simply wonderful! No fancy pants disposable could have kept that amount of poop in!

3) Our brand new diapersprayer. Our other one broke (apparently it's a manufacterer's flaw... wish I'dve know that sooner). So we ordered one this weekend and it arrived just two days later and boy have we used the heck out of it already! I love it way more than the other one and it had no negative reviews like the other one!

Scrapbooking

2011-11-07T15:08:00.000-06:00

I've been working on Anna's scrapbook for a few days now. I love to scrapbook, but I really like to do a lot at once. So I've waited. All along I've been organizing her pictures into folders on the computer. All of our pictures are sorted first by year, then by event (or in her case, Anna's name), then sorted appropriately in each category. Anna's are sorted by her age in months. This helps me to be able to easily find pictures and know exactly how old she was.

Now, starting her scrapbook was a daunting task. As you may have noticed, I've taken a billion pictures of her and continue to do so... So picking just a few to highlight was hard. I picked up to 10 from each month as well as her newborn pictures, the day we got her, her baptism, adoption day, and 6 month pics.

Then came the fun part. Ordering them. I signed up for Shut.terfly and got 50 free prints. So that took care of some (I had a total of 136 to print). I then looked on Sn.apfish where I already had an account and realized that I had 25 free prints to use. Ok, over halfway there. Then they also had a deal where prints ordered to the store were only 9 cents a print! So in the end, I got 136 prints for $6. Not too bad!
My mom had given me a bunch of baby girl paper to use. Thanks mom! So I got started! In just two days, I got all caught up and am current! I plan on doing the next "batch" just before her birthday so that she has a completed scrapbook to show off!

Here are a few pictures of a few pages I've done... And stupid auto-correct wants them to be up and down. It annoys me!

And here are a few current pictures of Anna just because I can't resist sharing!

Rocking out with her guitar. She was bouncing up and down to the music.

Reading a few of her saint books on All Saint's Day!

Quick Takes (4)

2011-11-03T22:37:00.000-05:00

--- 1 ---

I made homemade bread yesterday! It was delicious! My grandparents have been working to clean out their house. They've made great progress and were getting rid of a very gently used, not very old bread machine. They asked if I'd use it and I quickly snatched it up! They also had a cool bread slicer thing so I can slice all the pieces the same size and a storage thing from Tupp.erware. I love it!! The smell and taste of the bread took me back to my childhood. My mom and my best friend's mom always made bread! Annie's (my bf growing up) mom always made the MOST delicious grilled cheese with it. I can't wait to make some tomorrow!

--- 2 ---

Yesterday was my monthly meal making day. I made a months worth of meals including lasagna, vegetable soup, and enchildas. It's a lot of work in one day, but it all pays off when I can open the freezer and pull out dinner. And my house smells yummy! And when I do it all at once, I take the time to make it all from fresh ingredients and make it all from scratch.

--- 3 ---

I could not live without my Mei Tai. It makes life with two babies so much more managable. For instance, when Luke eats lunch, Anna begs for food and whines at me to pick her up. She wants in on the action, she hates to be left out. So I put her on my back and she's happy as a clam. She gets to spend time with us, on our level, until it's her turn for the high chair! And it also helps when I go somewhere, I can have one in a stroller and one on my back. It's so much easier than a double stroller. I love babywearing!

--- 4 ---

We planned a little getaway weekend and I cannot wait! Jeremy has his Actuary exam next week. He spends four months studying, takes a test, has two months off waiting for the results and then gets back to studying. If he passes, he moves on. If he doesn't, he studies for that one again. So we always go out to celebrate the end of a study period. This time we're using free hotel nights we have and we're going to just have a relaxing weekend. Also that weekend is a National Adoption Month potluck for Catholic Charities in our diocese and its in the neighboring town to where we're staying.

--- 5 ---

While we're gone, we're hoping to meet up with the newborn foster parents who took care of Anna before we got her. They're such nice people and they live minutes from where our hotel is! I would love to see them!

--- 6 ---

We're absolutely ready to get moving on Adoption #2. I wish tax season would hurry up and get here so we can recycle Anna's adoption money. We can't really do anything until then!

--- 7 ---

Isn't my little ladybug so cute? She had so much fun answering the door on Halloween. And she got lots of treats from her grandparents who got her baby snacks and formula! She enjoyed all of the attention and just looked so stinkin cute!

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

National Adoption Month

2011-11-01T09:43:00.000-05:00

First, let me say Happy All Saint's Day! What a wonderful day to celebrate those holy men and women who gave their lives to Christ. I hope to follow in their footsteps! And we're definitely celebrating today!

I wrote this post a year ago. I'm amazed at the amount of hope I had. I don't remember feeling that way, but I'm glad that I was hopeful. It was not a few weeks later that we learned that we had been identified by a birth mom. I'm glad I can look back and see my hope because sometimes I only remember the hopeless feeling and I forget my positive emotions as well. So here goes again (I've editted a few parts, simply because a lot has changed in a year. For the original post, unedited, go here.) And everything I said was so true.

November is National Adoption Month!! So maybe during the month of November, say some extra prayers for all of those involved in the adoption process:

~ Birth moms who face the toughest and most important decision of their life and the life of their child

~ Case workers who deal with everything from the most touching to the saddest cases you can ever imagine

~ Foster parents who care for and give a temporary home to those waiting to be adopted

~ Adoptive parents who are in any and all stages of the adoption process

~ Those discerning adoption as a means of expanding their family

~ And most importantly for the Children involved in the process whether born or unborn, especially those who are waiting and are desperately longing for a forever home

This is fitting as November also marks the point, last year, at which we began to pursue adoption two years ago. It's hard to believe that two years have gone by, but that November (2009) was when we learned the devastating news that (more than likely) we will not have children of our own. It was also the month that we prayed constantly for guidance as to what God's plans were for our future family. It was those prayers that led us to Catholic Charities where we began our adoption process.

The last year two years were a total roller coaster for us. We have had some extreme highs and some extreme lows. However, I know now that I can look back and understand it all more clearly, at least I hope :-).All of the mountains of paperwork, money, time, effort, tears, smiles, and sweat were blown away the moment we became parents. I'm so grateful for the gift of Adoption and what it has meant for our family. I love Anna more than words can describe. She is 100% totally and completely our daughter and I can't even express how happy that makes me.

I am so thankful to her birthmom, R, for her courageous and selfless choice. I thank her for taking such good care of her for those 10 months and for giving her a great start to life. I thank her for choosing life for her daughter. I thank her for choosing us to be Anna's parents. It brings tears to my eyes thinking about what a wonderful gift R is to our family. I hope that someday I can thank her personally. For now, I hope she knows!

So to end my nostalgic post, here's a link to my Birthmom's Day Celebration post. And here's the adoption song that I have listened to countless times since. Happy National Adoption Month! Say some extra prayers this month for all involved in the Adoption process!

Holidays

2011-10-31T13:04:00.002-05:00

As we head towards the end of the year and approach multiple holidays, I can't help but think about holidays past.

Each year, we hoped and prayed for a child. And each year, the holidays rolled around and it was still just the two of us.

It really was only 3 years, but it felt like an eternity. And I hated feeling like I just had to get through them. Maybe part of it was that we'd been together for so long (we're going on 10 years together). When you've spent 7 Christmas with just the two of you and you're hoping and praying for a child, another 3 is almost torture.

The holidays were hard. Being around so much family with so many children around and everyone asking "So when are you guys going to have kids?" A lot of times, I just wanted to crawl in a hole. I wanted to shout, "If it were only that easy!" I usually just said something like "Whenever God blesses us with children." But what I said in my head was "Mind your own business, it's a very touchy subject!"

Infertility affects you every single day. And I haven't touched on it much since we've adopted Anna, but that doesn't mean the emotions that come with have gone away completely. I'm grateful for our daughter, each and every day. And I feel so blessed to be able to be a part of Adoption. It is truly a blessing and something I treasure a lot.

In reality, it's kind of hard to explain. I don't ever long to be pregnant. In fact, it was always something that scared me and was never something I looked forward to. I don't ever long for a child that looks like me. To me those things have just never mattered. Infertility affects me in that it takes away all of my control.

And maybe that's what I need...

So anyway, I didn't mean for this to be a post about infertility, but it's been on my mind lately.

I'm finally looking foward to the holidays this year. I look forward to sharing the traditions that Jeremy and I have begun with Anna. I look forward to making new ones. I look forward to sharing the birth of Christ with my daughter and helping her understand it in the years to come. I'm looking forward to eating turkey and stuffing with her on Thanksgiving and teaching her how to take a nice football nap. I'm looking forward to answering the door tonight with my cute little ladybug and handing out candy. And I'm looking forward to the focus being on the blessing we've been given through Anna instead of the cross we've been given through infertility.

And I'm keeping in my prayers all of those who long for a child and are still waiting. And I pray for patience, hope, and peace.

8 Months Old

2011-10-28T08:42:00.000-05:00

Our baby girl is 8 months old today! Where has the time gone? She is just such a big ball of fun right now. Here are some things she's doing:

She's been smiling really goofy lately...

"Here mom, take a picture of giraffe!"

- Crawling: She's been doing this for 2 months now, but boy is she fast all of the sudden!

- Standing: She pulls herself up on everything and now lets go with both hands! She's stood by herself quite a bit now and will stand until she decides to get down and crawl. She also tries to stand from a sitting position but hasn't figured that out yet... it won't be long!

- Cruising: She walks all over furniture all the time. She also will walk holding our hands now. In fact, she walked down the aisle at my sister's wedding with Jeremy holing one hand and me holding the other! It was super cute!

- Eating: She eats primarily "real" food now, not pureed stuff. She doesn't want the purees. She wants the chunky stuff we're eating. There's not really anything we don't give her, she'll eat it all! She hasn't had any food reactions thus far, so hopefully she won't have any food allergies!

- Growing: Boy does she do that fast! She's around 20 lbs (YIKES!) but seems to be pretty proportionate. Honestly I think most of her weight is muscle. She is so STRONG! Way stronger than most babies her age or older. I can't believe some of the things she can do/push/pull! For instance, she loves to open our desk drawer that is filled with files. It takes a lot of effort for ME to get it open. She opens it with no problem! She's well into her 12 month clothes now. Hopefully she'll spend more time in this size than she did in the last!

- Talking: This has never been a problem for our Anna! She LOVES to talk and babbles more now than ever! Yesterday morning she woke up happily chatting/shouting in her crib. From then on, she shouted all day long! She's loud and likes to be the center of attention!

Having a tea party with daddy! He's the best daddy ever!

Every time she sees the camera, she comes racing towards it... So close-up facial shots are becoming quite common :-)

This one's for Papa, enjoying her Illini basketball! Ignore the super terribly put together outfit!

Slam dunk!

And finally, as an 8 month old, she already knows the finer things in life. She absolutely LOVES backrubs from daddy! They're just too sweet together, I am so blessed!

Family date night

2011-10-27T09:36:00.001-05:00

Boy am I glad the good days outweigh the bad days! Napping seems to be the key componet for me the babies.

Tuesday was rough, but yesterday consisted of a trip to McD's to play with friends.

Playing with ribbon off of my sister's wedding gifts. I told her I'd always take free ribbon! I love to make bows. Apparently its good for something else too!

Really good naps.

Lots of smiles and laughs!

And family date night!

Wednesdays are designated as "date nights". Usually this means that Wednesdays are left open with no other activities. We eat a dinner together (which happens most nights, but ALWAYS on Wed.). We usually go somewhere as a family, whether it's to the mall to just walk around, or on a walk, picnic, park, store, wherever, just to get out. Then when Anna goes to bed, Jeremy and I watch our two favorite shows (which are on on Wed). It's the one night a week we sit down to watch TV. We enjoy watching our shows together and simply hanging out. We usually stay up late talking and although we sometimes regret it Thursday morning, it's so nice to have that time set aside uninterupted.

So last night was one of our family date nights. We went out for dinner (a big luxury around here). We went to our favorite little cafe, Cafe Italia. They have authentic, from Italy, food and its amazingly delicious. The guys in there know us and although they didn't have gelato last night, we always get some of the straight from Italy gelato. They're currently moving to a new location (bigger, more seats) to accodate the demand so they'll be closed for a month. We wanted one more peek of the cafe as it was. It was really nice and Anna enjoyed the bread big time! And they gave her some free biscotti to munch on (and more to take home) because they just love seeing her!

Then we wandered around the mall and bought Anna her Christmas present. It's really early, but it's something she can use now. It's a little walker/ride on toy. I had coupons and store credit, so we got it for just $8! And she's enjoyed it a lot! And we're going to wrap up the box to put under the tree since she loved the box more than the toy!

Then we went to Confession and Mass at the Newman Center. We came home, put Anna to bed, and enjoyed our time together!

It was wonderful and just what I needed!

Bad day

2011-10-25T12:12:00.003-05:00

Today is not a good day.

Babies being accident prone.

Terrible nap for one and no nap at all for the other.

Scratches on faces.

Crying whenever I stand up or heaven forbid leave the room.

Lots of tears from all of us.

What is the deal? Why do I feel like I'm failing at this mom/nanny thing today? Why can't I stop being so frustrated today? Where did my patience go this morning?

I want snuggles and smiles and giggles and laughs like I get every other day... And I want to feel like I'm doing my best and giving the kiddos my best... Somehow I can't seem to do that today.

I need to start today over again.

So I'm going to do just that this evening. It's monthly confession time. And hopefully we'll have time to stick around for Mass afterwards too... I need a fresh start today. Thankfully thorugh Confession and the Eucharist I can get it!

Wedding Weekend

2011-10-24T08:46:00.000-05:00

We started off my sister's wedding weekend with guests. I've mentioned them in the last few posts and it was SOOO great to see them! Here is a picture recap of our weekend!

From left: Gracie, Anna, Katie, Joey. Anna thoroughly enjoyed all of the attention.

From left: Joey, Gaby, Gracie, Anna, Katie. I don't think she got enough attention this weekend!

From left: Me, Joey, Gaby, Gracie, Maggie. Here I am beating them all at Mari.o Ka.rt

Katie and Anna playing

While I was playing Wii with the big kids, Jeremy was playing "Dinner Party" with the little kids in the playroom. He really is the best husband and dad ever!

This is our wedding day "before" picture. We had a little drama that morning with our little flower girl. Anna woke up with her eye matted shut and she'd been coughing for a few days. So while I got my hair done, Jeremy, in his tux, took her to the Dr. (who doesn't take walk-ins on Sat but felt bad for a daddy and his clearly sick baby, in a tux, on wedding day). She had pink eye (the bacterial kind, from her clogged tear duct) and bronchitis (from her allergies settling in her chest). So after some meds she was just fine and was a perfect angel all day long! And we made sure she wasn't contagious!

Us and the Seidel family!

Our family!

Daddy and his droopy eyed daughter!

Anna and Katie dancing!

The wedding cake I made for them!

She got very clingy as bedtime came and went. But as long as she was in my arms, she was a happy girl! And she was grateful to be out of the dress and in her comfy pjs.

And here's her today, after 12 hours of sleep, she's fully recovered and ready to play!

We are so happy for Sara and Kel! It was a beautiful wedding and I can't wait to see the photographer's pictures! We had so much fun and it's so wonderful to see a marriage begin! Lots of prayers coming your way Sara and Kel!

Friends and Family

2011-10-21T06:59:00.000-05:00

My sister gets married tomorrow! Yay!!!!

And its so great to have our dear friends in town staying with us. They have 5 children and Jeremy and I used to baby-sit them when they lived here. They've sinced moved 8 hours away to the very cold state of Minnesota.

We haven't seen them in a year and a half due to snow storms, flus and babies. The kids are SOOO BIG!! Why do they have to grow up so fast?

It's been so fun to see them, talk to them, catch up. They'ved loved seeing Anna, especially little Katie (7). She said she's Anna's new friend. She was so excited to play with Anna while Anna took a bath last night and she got to read her bedtime stories with Grace (9). I remember reading them bedtime stories not that long ago. Now they can read them to my daughter... It made me tear up a little bit!

It's just so great to see them. Our home is filled with girly chatter (they have 4 girls and a boy). And Joey (11) can't get enough of chatting with the guys and seeing his buddy Jeremy! Gaby (14) and Maggie (12) are so big now with Gabs in high school and Mags in jr. high! Gaby will learn to drive in January because she'll turn 15 in dec!

Not only do we get to spend the weekend with them, but all of our family is coming into town! We've seen family a lot this year with weddings and 100th birthdays, and we're so excited to see them all again! We are so blessed to have such wonderful families. It's always a blast!!

We're so blessed!

Out

2011-10-20T09:02:00.000-05:00

I have a feeling we may not be getting out much during the days as the weather continues to get colder.

I went out this morning (and its 40 degrees) and it consisted of:

Putting on two sets of coats and hats...

Taking off those same coats to put two babies in their carseats...

Putting those same coats back on after getting both babies out of their carseats...

Climbing in the backseat and...

Getting one baby in a sling...

One baby in a stroller...

While trying to make sure they're warm...

And happy...

And that I don't look like a frazzled mess once I get where I was going...

Maybe once one of them starts walking.

Oh yeah, don't forget diaper bags... And keys...

I have to say, as heavy as they are, it was nice when I had 2 babies in infant carriers with buntings that covered them head to toe! :-)

And I will be very good at the coat/carseat shuffle when (God willing) we're blessed with a second adoption!

And I'm definitely not complaining. I am joyful that I have a reason to stay in this winter. I am joyful that instead of running errands, I'm snuggling babies and playing with them and watching them grow!

Family/6 month/Adoption pictures

2011-10-17T20:03:00.000-05:00

We had our family pictures taken on Anna's Adoption Day. The girl who has taken all of our pictures for us is a family friend, is a senior in high school, and is amazingly talented with a camera. We'll have to plan all of our future photo sessions around her school breaks when she goes away to Franciscan! Here are the favorites:

Quick Takes (3)

2011-10-14T10:06:00.000-05:00

--- 1 ---

Anna most definitely went through a growth spurt last week. One night, she fit her 9mo. pjs, the next night they didn't fit at all. She was eating and sleeping like crazy and I was having to wake her up in the morning and from naps. This week she's tapered off the eating and is waking up on her own (earlier than I'd like :-) but still sleeping 10-11 hours straight at night. She's now in her 12mo. clothes and seems to have stopped the growth spurt, for now at least. So we've been scrambling to get her some clothes for this size, we had very few! Thank goodness for some gift cards!

--- 2 ---

Our very dear friends are coming in for my sister's wedding next weekend and staying with us. They moved to MN a few years ago and we've been to visit them every year before Christmas. Except this past year, when we thought baby boy was going to be born. We also were leary of the weather, as they were predicted to receive a huge snow storm that week, and they did in fact receive it. We've been stuck in a snow storm coming back from there once (4 hours sitting on I-80) and it was NOT fun. So it's been almost 2 years since we've seen them and their 5 kids. And they're not so little anymore! And they can't wait to meet Anna!

--- 3 ---

We're heading up to visit our good friends Jon and Justine this weekend to see them and meet their son Theodore! He's being baptized this weekend and we're his Godparents. We cannot wait to meet him!

--- 4 ---

While we're on the topic of good friends... We are so missing Anna's Godparents right now. They moved to Pensylvania a few months ago and have since had a baby boy, Matthias, who we want to see so bad. I just don't know if we're going to be able to make it out there before they come here for Christmas. But boy are we missing them...

--- 5 ---

The endless raking of leaves has begun at our house. We actually really enjoy it and boy are our trees beautiful! Only one has dropped all of its leaves so far and we managed to get them all raked before it rained this week (saving us from a soggy, leafy mess). Our tree out front is 100% gorgeous, its like firery red and is the most beautiful tree. It's started to drop and our front yard is littered with gorgeous red leaves. The big trees will start changing here soon and that's when the real work begins :-)! I love to just sit in the window and watch the leaves fall!

I don't like that blogger tries to auto adjust my photos and decide for me whether they're landscape or portrait. Anyone know how to fix this?

--- 6 ---

My sister's wedding is next weekend! We're really looking forward to it, and we're so happy for my sister,Sara, and her soon-to-be husband, Kelsey!

--- 7 ---

I love that I have had to replace decorative things with toys around the house. I don't like things messy, but I do love seeing baby toys strewn about (until I pick them up that is...). Picture frames were replaced with teethers and photo albums replaced with shape sorters and fall decorations placed up high to avoid little hands and to make room for stacking cups. It makes me smile every day and I'm so thankful for the blessing of my daughter. What a joy she is in our lives!

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

Chaos to Quiet

2011-10-13T13:28:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was chaos.

Today is quiet.

Yesterday consisted of:
lunchtime meltdowns and babies not eating said lunches.
Jeremy doing all of the dishes on his lunchbreak because I was on the verge of a meltdown.
babies scaling my legs while I attempted to change diapers.
naptime battles in which two cranky babies boycotted going to sleep but thankfully took very long naps.

Today consisted of:
lunch eaten by all, quietly, happily, and enjoyably.
me getting all of the dishes done while the babies played peacefully with fridge magnets.
babies shaking rattles and banged cups while I changed diapers.
babies quietly drifting off to sleep with smiles on their faces.

Why are some days like yesterday? I haven't figured it out yet, but I definitely enjoy the todays. I don't know if it's my attitude, weather, or what, but today has been an absolute joy and full of laughter. And yesterday was frustrating and made me feel as though I was failing.

Unfortunately I don't have any answers, but I'm enjoying every minute of today and since I have all of my "chores" done, I think I will go dive into a good book. Reading is quiet and peaceful, just like my day so far!

And as a side note, I love to see Anna beginning to understand the concept of sharing. It's so nice to have a playmate for her around every day. She's been terrible about taking toys from other kids and she's finally started to follow my lead of choosing something different to play with until they're done. After lots of gentle explaining and distracting and firm "no"s, she's getting the concept. It is so fun to watch the babies interact. They love to play and chase each other crawling. They talk back and forth and play "music" together with rattles and toys to bang. They're both so darn cute!! I'm lucky to be able to stay home and to watch Luke. I'm glad that I can snuggle my Anna and that Luke's mom can know that while she has to be away, her baby is getting lots of snuggles and individual attention.

While some days I question it, I know this is what God wants me to be doing. Less common days like yesterday make me value the sweet days like today.

Clumsy

2011-10-12T09:53:00.000-05:00

I've always been clumsy. It's evident by the large amounts of scars on my knees.

This week has been exceptionally clumsy...

First I dropped a bowl of cereal that I was eating. All over our couch.

Then as I was going downstairs to clean up the cereal mess, I fell down the stairs. I have a rather large bruise on my hip, a swollen toe, and a scraped up arm. But I did save the baby monitor...

Then I dropped Anna's oatmeal the next morning for breakfast. In a glass bowl. I'm lucky it didn't break. But oatmeal turns to concrete pretty quickly, let me tell you!

And I tripped over the baby gate upstairs in our hallway, knocking the whole thing over and waking Anna up from her nap.

Then I dropped a full cup of water on the floor.

Then I ran into my jewelry chest in the middle of the night causing a big bruise.

And if all that wasn't enough in the last 4 days, this morning I dropped a FULL container of uncooked oats on the floor. While Anna and Luke were standing hanging onto my legs in the kitchen.

I feel like maybe I should wrap myself in bubble wrap so as to avoid more bruises before my sister's wedding next weekend!

Or maybe I should just try to be more careful.

And then as soon as I published this, I went into the kitchen to do the dishes and lo and behold, I had forgotten to screw the cap back onto the dish soap-dispensing sponge... What a mess!!!

Saturday Snapshots

2011-10-08T13:36:00.000-05:00

Having pancakes in our pjs! She loves pancakes!!

Eating crackers and cheese on our Saturday afternoon picnic in the park!

Playing in the leaves with daddy.

Playing with a leaf. She loves to crunch them!

Prayers for a friend

2011-10-05T11:34:00.000-05:00

Please say an extra prayer for a friend today! It's a very exciting yet nerve-wracking day for them I'm sure. She's a neighbor, someone who I used to ride to school with. They got married the same day Jeremy and I did and have tried to have children ever since. After we began our adoption process and then were matched with a bm, they decided to look into adoption.

So they've been approved, had been waiting and today they got news that they're bringing home a baby boy! I don't know all the details, but please pray that all goes smoothly and that they can enjoy their new son worry-free! I'm so excited for them, what a blessing!!!!

Anna's Eyes 2

2011-10-04T08:11:00.000-05:00

Could those eyes get any more beautiful? Really? When she flashes those giant brown eyes at me, I melt. I cannot help but pick her up and snuggle her! She sure knows how to work it! Thanks R for passing on the most beautiful eyes ever to our babygirl!

On School

2011-10-01T11:00:00.000-05:00

The schooling of my children is something that I've thought a lot about recently. The way I see it, there are three options: homeschool, public school, and Catholic school. Now I've always assumed that when the time came, my kids would go to one of the Catholic schools in town (the one I went to probably) and that would be that!

However, I now have a lot of friends with kids in Catholic school and while I would love my kids to be able to go to school with their kids, it's incredibly expensive. Looking at the cost of tuition and looking at our yearly income, I don't see where it will fit. People always say that you just sacrifice in other ways. Well, we're at that point already, sacrificing in other ways, to afford adoption. How can we afford to continue to adopt children AND pay for Catholic school? I don't see a few thousand dollars of extras in our budget...

So I think about the other options. Obviously at this point, we have a few years (5 or so) and our income could change pretty dramatically in that time, and it may not even be an issue. But for now, I'll do my research so that when the time comes, I'm ready for whatever decisions face me (notice my organized/no surprises personality coming out).

So what about homeschooling? Well, let's just say that it's not for our family. I know a lot of people who homeschool and do it well. I applaud them for that. I'm not that person. People will argue with me and try to persuade me that I'm wrong, but the reality is all families are different. No one way of doing something is better or worse than another when it comes to schooling. In the last year, thinking about my children's futures, I've realized that there are a lot of things in life that I've passed judgments on very hastily. The reality is, outside of moral circumstances, different opinions and lifestyles are good. It's important to be surrounded by people who are different than you. How else can you become tolerant and accepting? How else can you learn that God alone can judge? And again, I'm not talking about morally different, I want my family to spend time with people whose morals match ours. That is important to our family because we believe in the Truth of what the Church teaches, not in interpreting morals for ourselves.

Okay, sorry for that digression, just had to get that out there! So what about public school? Our public schools around here are very good schools. We have two school districts and the "competition" to be better than the other makes for outstanding teachers and staff I feel. Like I said, though, I'm leery of my children hanging out with people whose morals and values are different. Then I ready this article at NCR. Much of this is how I feel. I hope my children can be examples of friendship, kindness, love, loyalty, and most of all faith among their peers. Whether that is in public or Catholic schools, I want that for them. The article softened my heart to the possibility of public schooling.

So then it makes me realize that I will also, in fact, homeschool in a way. Anna's moral development should start here, in my home. I have to build her a foundation of rock, not sand, so that her schooling can build on that. What a responsibility that is. It makes me look at my own faith life and realize I have a long way to go, in a very short amount of time. So that when Anna looks at me, her mother, she wants to imitate grace and love, kindness and generosity. Not fear or impatience. Not frustration or worry.

Looks like I'd better start working on that now.

St. Anne... pray for me!

St. Clare... pray for me!

St. Gianna... pray for me!

Mother Mary... pray for me!

Quick Takes (2)

2011-09-30T08:10:00.000-05:00

link

--- 1 ---

So I wrote this post about meal planning and how I grocery shop once a month (on or after payday). Well, tomorrow's payday which means grocery day. However, in the meantime we're out of pretty much everything including milk and bread. So when I realized today that I was finishing up the milk (we have cereal just about every day), I started thinking about breakfast tomorrow. So I ran across this recipe for blueberry muffins. I had to search for a dairy free recipe since I am out of those items. And I had frozen blueberries, and some comments said it mattered, but I thawed them out and it was fine. It uses orange juice... sounded weird. They were amazingly delicious and I WILL be making them again soon! And I could use just about any fruit I have on hand.

--- 2 ---

Our leaves are changing! We have lots of pretty trees and they're starting to fall! Anna, Luke and I sat outside and ~~ate~~ played with leaves for a while today! A few more weeks and we're going to have our raking work cut out for us! Anna will love it!

--- 3 ---

I like to watch Ext.reme Coup.oning. It intrigues me big time... And it's now my mission to figure out how to get toilet paper for free... That seems to be one thing all of those people have in common! And toothpaste. However, I did get bbq sauce free earlier this summer. It was on sale for 79 cents and I had a $1 off coupon! I was pretty excited. I usually save 10-20% of my grocery bill with coupons, but I'd love to save more!

--- 4 ---

Anna's pulling up on everything. She can't quite get to standing yet, but she gets up on one foot and one knee. And today she was playing with a toy in the middle of the floor, got up on both feet and lifted one hand and looked like she was just going to stand! Slow down baby girl!

--- 5 ---

We went to the pumpkin farm for the first time this year! Anna enjoyed it, despite getting a little nibble from a goat! She loved the jumpy pillow and the straw. We'll definitely have to make it out there again!

--- 6 ---

I love fall. I love decorating for fall and dressing for fall and eating for fall. There's something about it that shouts "family" to me and I just love that. We have a parish weenie roast coming up and I'm really looking forward to that! I could wear sweatshirts and jeans year round (if the weater would cooperate that is). I LOVE apples and all things apple. I'm going to get lots of apples at the store tomorrow and make homemade applesauce and homemade apple butter. And of course apple crisp and apple pie and apple ice cream and the list goes on... It's hands down my favorite season!

--- 7 ---

I need to be more intentional about getting out of the house with the two babies a few days a week. On weeks when we take walks or go to the park or go visit Luke's mom or whatever, we all have better days, take better naps, and get more done. Sometimes crankiness creeps in by the end of the week and I think we just get bored doing the same thing every single day. They like to be social once in a while. I just need to mix it up, maybe throw in some art projects. And I miss seeing all of my fellow B-N Catholic SAHM's and their kiddos...

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

7 months, 100 years, and a Godson

2011-09-28T08:44:00.000-05:00

7 MONTHS

Our sweet Anna is 7 months old today! I can't believe she's that old already! I just watch her everyday and wonder how I got so lucky to be her mom. She's unbelievably sweet and has taken to giving hugs to anyone who holds her. She gives a hug and then wants mom back. She's crawling everywhere, she's gotten fast, fast, fast and since it's not good enough to just crawl, she's started pulling up on everything. She has yet to understand that in order to stay up, she has to keep holding on... So she falls a lot, but she's tough and usually just picks back up and keeps going!

Her favorite things are mama and dada and she talks about us ~~frequently~~ all day long! She loves her giraffe and tends to have one with her at all times. She's a big fan of cold teethers, although she has yet to cut any teeth. She loves sitting under her jumparoo and playing with the toys from underneath. She loves being outside and she loves finding cords in our house. She especially loves drawers, and anything with a handle and she LOVES to eat! She's eating all kinds of things now and is great at chewing up chunks (even without any chompers!). She loves knocking over towers too.

Basically she's one big ball of fun! She's so busy all of the time and definitely crashes for naptime and nighttime. It's hard work playing all day! We just love her to pieces and can't imagine our lives without her! Happy 7 months to my sweet girl!

100 Years

And a very happy birthday to my great-grandma! She is 100 years old today. Quite the milestone I'd say! We're excited to go celebrate her birthday on Saturday! She's overcome a lot in her life, including lots of knee replacements and cancer as well as standing up for her rights as a woman when she was young. She raised 3 kids, has 5 grandchildren, 10 great-grandchildren, and 2 great-great-grandchildren! We have always enjoyed our time visiting great-grandma Maize, she always had many stories to tell (often more than once :-)) and she was always giving me things of hers that have my birthstone in them, since we have the same one. She always loved to quilt and has many beautiful crocheted and quilted pieces amongst the family. I'm so blessed to have so many grandparents alive!

I stole this from my dad, but it's interesting to think about. Here are a few things that were not around or prevalent when she was born: Refrigeration, Cars, Air travel, light bulbs, the telephone, electricity was a new concept. World War I had not occurred yet. She lived through a lot in history, its amazing that all of that happened in one person's lifetime! And sadly, as old as she is, even my great-grandma hasn't seen the Cubs win a World Series...

I've posted this picture before, but there's 5 generations here. My grandma, my great-grandma, myself and Anna, my dad!

Godson

Our Godson was born last night (I think it was last night, it could've been this morning though, I found out this morning). Theodore Justinian Joachim B. was 7lbs 12oz and is adorable! We can't wait to go see them in 3 weeks for his Baptism! Check out Justine's blog to read about their journey! We're so excited he's here, he is so loved!

In the last 7 days, we have 5 friends who have had babies! It's quite amazing really! September is the best month for birthdays! :-)

Quick Takes (1)

2011-09-23T13:52:00.000-05:00

Well, I haven't ever done Quick Takes before, but I enjoy reading other people's. And after I wrote this post, I realized it was random and a little all over. So here are my first Quick Takes!

It's been a very exciting week around here.

1.     It all began with a birthday party for a very special little boy. If you haven't read about James' birth and (what we believe to be a miraculous) healing, head on over to Bonnie's blog and read about it. His healing is being investigated for the cause for Archbishop Fulton Sheen's canonization. Read about it here. We were glad to be able to celebrate with their family and friends on his first birthday. He's an adorable and very loved little boy with no lasting effects from his traumatic entry into the world!

2.     We then went to a wedding of two friends that evening! We had a blast celebrating with friends and we're so happy for this beautiful, holy couple!

3.     Monday was Anna's Adoption Finalization.  A day we've been waiting for a long time!

4.     Tuesday was my birthday! Anna and Jeremy brough me breakfast in bed! And I spent the day relaxing, playing with the babies, and trying to catch up on laundry from a weekend of being gone! My parents took me out shopping to get some new clothes (which I desperately needed) and some for Anna too, because we just can't resist the baby girl clothes!

5.     Also on Tuesday, our very close friends had their baby! David was Jeremy's best man in our wedding and they've been friends since 1st grade. They just moved out to Pittsburg while he pursues his Doctorate in Scripture after living here for a year. Matthias Joseph was born Tuesday weighing in at an impressive 10lbs, 2oz at almost 42 weeks. We are so happy for them, he is absolutely beautiful and we cannot wait to go visit them in a few weeks!!! I seriously cannot get there fast enough to kiss those chubby cheeks of his!! And I'm so excited that we now share a birthday! He's got the best birthday ever :-)

6.     Tonight we're celebrating birthdays with my family, mine and my soon-to-be brother-in-laws which was yesterday. We're also trying on our bridesmades dresses to get them altered (and hem mine about 40 inches as usual). Then tomorrow we're having a bridal shower/bachelorette party for my sister (I can't believe one of my sisters is getting married in just under a month!!). And then I think the chaos dies down for a few weeks until the wedding! And I tried on Anna's flower girl dress today. Oh. My. Goodness! How adorable can one baby get! She's gonna be pretty cute! I'm a bridesmaid, Jeremy is a groomsmen, and Anna's the flowergirl, so we'll all match and we get to carry her down the aisle! We're so excited!

7.      And we're eagerly awaiting the birth of another baby. Our good friends Jon and Justine are due to have their baby boy here very soon. We can't wait to meet him!  He's also our Godson, so we're super excited for his baptism soon after he's born!!!
         Random story about these two little baby boys and their parents and us... We've spent the past two New Year's with David and Stephanie and Jon and Justine.   For the past two New Years, the three of us couples were all in the midst of trying to grow our families through children. We were pursuing adoption after infertility, and the other two couples had been TTC since their weddings as well with Jon and Justine suffering a miscarriage not too long before.   This past New Years, the men were playing Wii in the basement and the women were upstairs discussing the challenges of infertility and at the same time glad that we were able to talk about it with other people who were going through it themselves.   We prayed that by the next New Years celebration, we'd all have a child. (We were identified by the birthmom at this point, and were still waiting for the baby to be born in early Feb.)
         Shortly after that, Stephanie found out she was pregnant. Beginning of February, Justine found out she was pregnant. We then suffered our adoption fall through and although we were over the moon excited for our friends, we were sad that we had not yet been blessed with a child. Until early March, that is. It's amazing that in just 3 short months, we all had been blessed with children.
         Let me tell you, this New Years is something to celebrate for sure. I doubt we'll be able to stay up as late and we definitely won't have the luxury of sitting down just to chat, but it will be joyous and fun and it will be fun to raise our kids together. Despite the geographical distance between the three of us, we're very close friends and will always remain that way. We're truly blessed to have shared this journey with these two couples and we can't wait to see our families expand and grow closer.

FINALIZATION!!!

2011-09-19T14:47:00.000-05:00

It's done, it's final! Anna Clare Head is forever and for always ours! We've always known it in our hearts, but now we can see it on paper. Nothing has changed and everything has changed. We love her so much! What a wonderful blessing in our lives!

Here's the strawberry cake with vanilla icing that I made for Anna's Adoption Day! I can't wait to eat it tonight! And I'll probably give her a little bit too!

Right after the hearing. The judge was signing the Adoption Finalization papers! And since it's a small world, my parents knew our lawyer, and we went to school (she was one year younger) with the judge's daughter!

Nana, daddy, mommy, Anna, grandma, and grandpa. Papa was taking care of his dad, so he was unable to be there, but with us in spirit!

She's so happy to be adopted (despite the frowny face...)

And right afterwards, we walked across the street to a local bakery and had some treats. She got a taste of a pumpkin roll and blueberry muffin and enjoyed showing off her sippy cup skills to her grandparents.

We're going to get our family pictures taken in about an hour (it finally stopped raining and hopefully will stay dry...). Then we're going out for dinner with our families! What a fantastic reason to celebrate, we are so blessed and so thankful for all of the prayers and support. We are so lucky to get to raise the most beautiful girl! She's such a joy!!

Bath, Bears, and Crawling

2011-09-15T20:45:00.000-05:00

Anna LOVES bathtime! Especially the part where she gets to play with her daddy! She doesn't so much like the combing out of the hair part!

Daddy and Anna ready for the first Bears game of the season! Grandpa got her the Cutler jersey!

Ready for the game in her football stance! I wish we could take credit for the appropriate pose, but she does it all the time!

Always ready to eat!

Snuggling with Mama when she didn't feel well. She doesn't handle drastic weather changes very well... Neither do her mom or dad...

6 months old and she figured out crawling. She's very determined! This was short distance, the next video she goes across the room! It's easier for her if she doesn't have pants on to slip on the carpet... Although she's had to get good at it with pants on this week, it's been chilly!

Rainy Day

2011-09-14T13:08:00.000-05:00

There's something about a cool rainy day... They're nice once in a while, especially when rain is scarce around these parts right now. But they just don't make for the best of moods (in babies either, I've found out today). And I'm thinking instead of...

- making dinner

- picking up toys

- cleaning the bathroom

- vacuuming the carpet

- doing the dishes

- rotating the laundry

- sweeping the floor

... i'm gonna just take a nap!

It probably doesn't help that I'm ready for this week to be over because next week is a big week! Monday is Anna's adoption! And Tuesday is my 26th birthday! I'm so not patient!

Rundown

2011-09-09T15:21:00.000-05:00

Well, we've had a busy, but very fun week here at the Heads. Here's the rundown:

Friday-Sunday:
We went up to Wisconsin to visit with our good friends Jon and Justine! We stayed with them for the weekend and then went to their baby shower cookout on Sunday! It was great to see them and so fun to celebrate the upcoming birth of their son (our Godson)! Anna also started crawling while we were there, she'd been close, but she did it for the first time Saturday night before bed.

Monday:
We hung out as a family. We lounged around, took a walk in the park, and just spent some time enjoying our little family. We then had my parents and sister and her fiance over for a cookout. It was really nice!

Tuesday:
Back to work! The little guy I watch has finally adjusted to being here every day and boy is he fun! Him and Anna talk and play all day long and I LOVE to watch them play! I also love to play with them! Anna was very proud of herself for finally being able to crawl after him. She's slow, but watch out, she's determined! RCIA started back up Tuesday evening. It's going to be a fun year, so far we have around 7 candidates, but that can change at any point.

Anna also had her 6 month check-up. She's now 17.6 pounds, 26 inches long and the exact same percentiles that she was at 4 months. 75% for weight, 55% for height. The doctor was quite impressed with her develoment and said she's a picture of health! Yay Anna! Her shots didn't really bother her this time either, so all was good!

Wednesday and Thursday:
Well, pretty normal days but busy in the sense that I take care of two babies all day... And now that they're moving, they're into everything! I cleaned the house during naptime on Thursday and feel caught up now. Then I went out for Mom's Night Out which we do monthly. I've left Anna with Jeremy for the last 3 months or so, but always after she fell asleep. Last night I left before bedtime and she did great! That's the first time I've left her that she hasn't spent the whole time screaming. It was nice to get out and know that she was smiling and snuggling with daddy!

Friday:
Luke left early today to spend the afternoon with his mom and Anna's taking a fantastic nap so I'm enjoying some much needed relax time. Catching up on blogs, shows that I've DVR'd and a short nap! Tonight we're going to do some furniture moving in the basement, have waffles for dinner, and watch a movie, since we have a free rental.

This weekend we've got a birthday party a little guy who I took care of at daycare and lives a few houses down. He was extremely attached to me whne he was in the infant room at daycare and we see them all of the time since we live so close! He always invites us to his birthday parties and I can't belive he's already turning 3! Quick funny story about him, my mom and I worked in the same room at the daycare. So one day his mom, sister and him stopped by as they were taking a walk and my mom happened to be here. He said, "Oh, look, it's the other Ms. Karen!" referring to my mom... Since then he's asked about the "other Ms. Karen" every time he sees me! Hmmm, think we look/sound alike?

Then we have my sister's bridal shower on Sunday and the first Bears game! Anna has a jersey that's a little big, but it will work and Jeremy cannot wait!!

And I love this weather, please stay like this for a long time! Fall is my favorite time of year and 60s-70s are absolutely wonderful!

Giraffe... Updated

2011-09-07T13:39:00.000-05:00

Has anyone seen this giraffe?

What I really mean is we definitely need another one. Because she only sleeps like this:

And it's becoming a little stinky... Because naptime and bedtime are the only chances to get laundry done... And unless that giraffe is tucked in that little baby's arm, I don't get naptime or bedtime... So here lies my cyclical problem. Oh yeah, and if we lose it, I fear we're doomed, no other toy, animal, book, blanket, etc... does the trick.

It seems as though this giraffe never existed, no matter how many google searches I do for Cart.er's giraffe, I'm never lead to this particular giraffe. I've tried asking the lady who gave it to us... no response. I've checked all of the stores in town (and some other towns when we were in Chicagoland this weekened) with no luck whatsoever! And it's NOT the musical one. They have one now that looks just like it, but it's bigger and plays music. Ours does not, it's just soft...

So here's my plea for anyone who spots this small (~8 inches tall) very yellow with green and orange spots giraffe! It's cute and Anna loves it! She rubs it and chews on it to go to sleep and if she wakes up and can't find it, she becomes very upset! She said goodbye to the paci months ago and replaced it with something that I can't figure out how to get two of...

**And blogger is still messing up my photos... Boo...

**Update: So 2 hours after I posted this my hubby found this priceless giraffe on Ama.zon. Apparently it's a Car.ter's Bean Bag, not a stuffed giraffe like I was searching for... Silly me for searching the wrong thing! You can bet I'll be purchasing one or two of them!

Meal Planning

2011-09-01T14:35:00.000-05:00

The last few months, I've been trying to be better about making healthy, intentional meals. When we first got Anna, we were eating a lot of freezer meals that I'd made previously as well as eating out or at our parents' homes. We were trying to adjust to life with a newborn and I had little time for meal planning or cooking or even thinking about it! Now that life has settled into a routine, I knew I had to readdress the issue of meals.

You see, I love to cook. I hate to clean up... I like my kitchen to be spotless and when I cook I often feel like it explodes and I'm left with a giant mess to clean up. Dishes are my least favorite chore, they seem to never stop coming! So I needed to devise some way to enjoy cooking dinner for my family, save us money on groceries, incorporate food for Anna, and make minimal mess!

So meal planning was my solution. You might be thinking "duh" but it's something that overwhelmed me. Why would I decide what I'm going to have for dinner 3 weeks from now? That seems crazy, how do I gather all of those ingredients?

So here's what I do. It works and I like it. A lot.

- We grocery shop once a month, on or around payday. Aside from the short trips for milk, we try to stay away from the grocery store. The longer I'm in there, the more I pick up, and the more money we spend.

- A few days before the big grocery shopping event I make a menu. I have a few cookbooks, including one that my mom and I have compiled of family recipes. I try to find recipes that have similar ingredients, and I also try to find ones with ingredients that are on sale that week. For instance, if one thing uses pork, I buy pork chops in bulk (on sale) and find other recipes that utilize pork in a different way. This may sound like our meals are boring, but I make sure I'm creative to avoid that. When I find a recipe, I write it down on the calendar and I write down where the recipe was from, what page it's on, and then add the ingredients to my grocery list. I throw in a few leftover days on the weekends usually (although Jeremy likes leftovers for lunches) and Fridays are homemade pizza days and I account for any days I don't need to make dinner (this month there were a lot!).

- An organized list is key to my system. So I use excel. I sort everything by group (I know the aisles in the grocery store so they're pretty much sorted by aisle). As I find recipes and add them to the calendar, I add the ingredients (that I don't already have on hand) to the list. This organized list has saved me from forgetting things and being all over the store at any given time.

- All month I've cut coupons from the paper and online sources (our printer's out of ink at the moment, so my coupon supply was down this month) and I sort the coupons by section (the same as my list sections).

- I match my coupons to my list and put them in an envelop. With my list, my coupons, my list manager (Jer), and my grabber-off-the-shelfer (Anna :-)) safely tucked in the Mei Tai, we head to the stores. We go to Sa.m's Club first and pick up the things we need in bulk. This saves us a lot of money (especially on formula). Then we go to Meij.er. After a long evening of shopping and countless people telling us how adorable our baby is and countless people laughing at how loud she is, we check out and head home.

- When we get home, we put it all away and I begin making meals. We went grocery shopping last night, so I made meals today during naptimes. I prep and/or freeze whatever I can. For instance, today I made: chili, lasagna soup, prepped pork chops for a maple pork chop recipe, pureed peas, sweet potatoes, pears, avocado, squash and bananas for Anna, chopped veggies for minestrone and corn chowder (apparently I was in a soup mood, I'm ready for fall...) and pesto.

- Each day I look at the next day's menu, being sure to set out anything from the freezer I need, and meal time is easy peasy!

And that is how I make a big mess all at once and my kitchen is clean for the rest of the month! And my family's eating healthy! And my baby girl always has homemade food on hand!

6 months old!

2011-08-30T11:04:00.000-05:00

Again with the dumb lines? I don't know why it does that... Anyway, here are a few pictures to start...

Sunday marked Anna's half birthday! She's getting so big so fast! Here are some things she's been up to:

- She's been on the verge of crawling now for two weeks. She's up on her hands and knees (and sometimes all the way to her feet) all of the time. She goes backwards but has yet to figure out how her hands and knees have to work together. It won't be long now!

- Since she spends so much time on her hands and knees, she's figured out how to get from a crawling position to a sitting position and back in a very graceful move. She no longer just flops on the floor!

- This girl talks ALL. THE. TIME! She says "dada" and "mama" and "baba" and all kinds of other consonants. She says "dada" and "mama" intentionally when she wants us, the others are just babbling. It's so sweet and I love it when she wakes up from her nap and over the monitor I hear a quiet "mama..." and then she gets louder until she cracks herself up! She has only one volume and it's loud. She squeals a lot, although less than she used to, now she just talks loudly. We're in trouble when she gets words out, she's never going to stop!

- Her napping has gotten so much more consistent in the last few months. She's finally on a regular nap schedule and taking a good long afternoon nap. It makes things much easier for me as I have time to get some stuff done during that time!

- She's eating a variety of foods now. She's had rice, oatmeal, avocado, banana, pears, sweet potatoes and some various bread. She loves those puffs, she accidentally got a hold of one from the little guy I watch and she knew what to do with it and ate it great. She seems a little young to be eating finger foods, but she does GREAT with them, and loves them! She actually chews them and o0ens her mouth for more! She's absolutely not picky about anything, she'll eat whatever we put in her mouth and she has yet to refuse a bite. We're lucky, hopefully she stays that way!

- She just moved up to the 6-9 month clothes a week ago. One day they were too big and the 3-6 still fit and the next the 3-6 was way too tight and the 6-9 fit. She literally grew overnight! I was sad to put away those clothes, but at the same time, I was ready for a new set of clothes to put her in! We still haven't really had to buy any clothes, people were and are so generous (and her grandmas have too much fun in the baby girl section, they love to spoil their grandaughter :-))

- She still sleeps great at night. She goes down by 8 and getes up at 6 for a bottle and goes back down until we have to wake her up for the day at 8! We're spoiled and I thank her for it every morning!

- She's always happy, until a toy gets out of her reach and she can't quite get it. She loves people and is at such a fun age. She's playing with toys and chewing on everything and enjoying peek-a-boo and songs and all kinds of fun stuff! Her favorite song is "Twinkle, Twinkle" and if you would have told me a 6 month old has a favorite song a while ago, I would've thought you were crazy. But, when we sing it she cracks up every time and if she's crying and we sing it, instant smiles. It's hilarious and we love to sing it and make her smile!

We're so thankful for our sweet Anna! She's such a blessing in our lives and such a joy to have around! We're looking forward to her adoption day coming up as well as her 6 month dr. appt! We can't thank God enough for our sweet blessing! She's so beautiful and we're so happy!

Final Adoption Day!

2011-08-24T13:18:00.000-05:00

We finally got notice from our lawyer about Anna's final adoption day! And not only is it in less than a month, but it's the day before my birthday! We got Anna a week before Jeremy's birthday, had her baptized on Mother's Day, and now her final adoption is just a day before my birthday! We are SOOO excited to have everything finalized! And such a wonderful birthday present at that!

Cloth Diapers

2011-08-23T13:20:00.000-05:00

I've written before about using cloth diapers, but briefly. I get asked a lot of questions about our cloth diapers, so here is a Q&A about how we do things around here :-)!

Why do you cloth diaper?
This is the easy one... There are many answers! First of all, I am all about anything reusable. I hate to throw things away or buy things that are disposable. I try not to use paper towels, I use cloths instead. I don't use disposable baggies, I use glass or plastic containers instead to store/send lunches, etc... So for me, it was a matter of buying something to use and use and use as opposed to something that was designed to be used and thrown away. Also cost was a big factor. Anna's adopted, that cost lots and lots of money that I would gladly spend again in a heartbeat. But in order for us to save that money, we had to cut back in lots of areas. This was one way to spend a sum of money (much less than disposable diapers) and use it for Anna and all of our future children. Another reason and certainly not the last, but I'll stop here, is the material. I have researched what's in disposables and I don't like the idea of some of those things touching her bottom. And I ask myself, would I rather wear paper underwear or cloth? Dumb question, easy answer! So I choose to put her bottom in something soft that will keep her dry and clean all day long!

Do they leak?
Well, until yesterday, I would have said... never! I hadn't had any of her diapers leak, even overnight. Yesterday we adjusted the rise on her diapers (they're one size fits all) and I had to adjust the insert accordingly. I did not, and therefore had lots of leaks... It was user error, not diaper error... And no different than if I put the wrong size disposable on her... In this case, all I had to do was wash them and try again! However, when she did leak once overnight, I adjusted the absorbency for the following night by adding a hemp doubler inside. That fixed it, she just needed more absorbency as she was eating more, makes complete sense!

How often do you have to do laundry, isn't that a pain?
Well, babies come with laundry. I don't know that anyone would disagree. Especially Anna who is like a super spitter baby! I actually do her diapers every day, it's easiest for me because I don't like laundry to pile up and I don't like folding lots of it. I'd rather fold a small amount each day. It's a personality thing. Most people I'd say do diaper laundry every 2-3 days without any issues. And no, it's not a pain, I sit and stuff diapers in the evening when I'm watching TV, Anna's asleep and Jer's studying. It doesn't bother me a bit, in fact it's relaxing!

Don't they smell?
No, in fact, this is one of the reason why I love cloth diapers! I don't have stinky diapers sitting around in my trash can in my house or garage, waiting for Tuesday morning to come so the stink can be temporarily removed! I have baby-sat A LOT in my life and I HATED walking into a house and knowing they had a baby due to the poop smell! It was awful and no fancy pants trash can ever got rid of it! All of Anna's poop gets flushed down the toilet. No stink. I have a regular trash can with a lid that has a cloth liner in it. I throw her wet diapers in there, close the lid, wash the liner with the diapers and never have an issue with stink. At one point her diapers were starting to smell a little bit and after asking our "diaper lady" (She owns the shop in town), I discovered that I was simply using too much detergent and it had built up in the diapers! Easy fix, no more smell, way better than poop in my trash can!

What about the poop? How can you possibly deal with that?
Well, for those who can breastfeed, it's easy, breastmilk poop is water soluble, it can be thrown straight in the laundry, no problem, not icky! Formula is a different story. It must be removed before washing. So we have a handy dandy diaper sprayer! It hooks onto the toilet and sprays the poop off the diaper into the toilet. There is a learning curve, you have to figure out the appropriate pressure so that you don't end up spraying the whole bathroom, but after a few times, you get the hang of it! It's nice to be able to flush her stinkyness down the toilet and not have to smell it! It's not that gross, I don't ever have to touch anything icky, I just have to spray it and hold a clean part of the diaper. I like to remind myself that it's significantly easier than going to the store to buy more diapers :-)! Also, now that she's eating more solids, it makes it much much easier to just dump it into the toilet!

What kind of diapers do you use, do you like them?
We use a combination of a few. We have mostly BumG.enius 4.0's which are pocket diapers meaning there's a waterproof outside with a stay dry inside and a pocket where I stuff an insert or two depending on naptime/bedtime or playtime. Those are my favorites, we've had no problems with them, they keep her bottom dry and they fit perfectly! I also have a few BumG.enius All-in-Ones (Elementals) which have a waterproof outside and layers of organic cotton inside. No stuffing required, just use, wash, dry, use. I like these ones for their ease of use (one piece). And I like the organic cotton next to her bottom, it's so soft! The only issue with these is that the organic cotton isn't stay-dry so her bottom feels the wetness. It doesn't usually bother her, I just don't use them for naptimes or long c!r rides because I don't want her sitting in wet. The rest of the time, they're no problem, she doesn't seem to care if she's wet. Finally, I have some Rum.parooz. These are also pocket diapers. I like these as well, especially because they fit her great when she was really small. The fit of these is a little funny on Anna, she has no bottom, it's flat... These ones have double gussets which are extra elastic layers inside which keep poop in great (especially for newborns). She's never leaked poop in any of her diapers (a huge plus compared with disposables, I worked in daycare, I've seen my fair share of blowouts). I love my diapers and it's nice to have a little variety as I use different ones for different times!

How do you wash them?
Washing was something I just had to learn about. You can't use fabric softeners, brighteners, or a few other things with the diapers. This is because they're designed to absorb moisture. All of those things can clog them and make them repel liquid (the opposite of how you want your diaper to work). So I use a detergent called Planet. They sell it at a few grocery stores here in town and I use the powdered. In my HE front loader, I only need 3/4 of a tsp to wash my diapers. They're clean and smell free every time. I also use the Planet for all of our other clothes. Anna's pretty sensitive and this detergent works great! I do the diapers on a cold cycle first and rinse and drain the tub. Then I throw in other stuff to make it a full load (at this point there's no icky matter left on the diapers, it's all drained out). I run a hot cycle and then I do an extra rinse to make sure all of the detergent is out. My washer has buttons for all of this, so it sounds like I do a lot, but really I throw it in there and walk away. Then I hang dry my diapers and inserts. I used to dry the inserts, but they dry in the same amount of time either way (they don't get totally dry with one dryer cycle). And since I do diapers every day, I just always have some hang drying and some ready to use! Its very easy!

How does travelling/leaving the house work?
Planetw.ise wet bags! They're bags that are completely waterproof. I throw the dirty diaper in it, zip it up and deal with it at home! They're wonderful, I have two, and could use about 10 more! It's so easy and I never have to find a trash can! I change diapers in the trunk of the car all of the time, it's cleaner than most bathroom's changing tables!

What do you do about wipes?
Well, my desire to not have to buy anything disposable kicks in here too. I use baby wash cloths. They make great wipes. I have spray bottles of water and I spray the wash cloth, wipe the bottom, and throw them in with the diaper! If they have poop on them, I spray it into the toilet and throw it in the pail. I don't even own wet wipes! I also always have them available this way for dirty hands, food messes, spit rags, whatever Anna can throw at me!

Those are all of the questions I could think of right now, but if you have any others, don't hesitate to ask! We love using cloth diapers, my hubby was skeptical at first, but he wouldn't do it any other way now! Some of our family was skeptical at first too, but they've seen how easy it is and realized it's not as crazy as they once thought! We even cloth diapered on vacation and had no issues what so ever! It was just as easy as home and I didn't have to worry about rashes from disposables! It was also nice because I could change her in the car and didn't have to find a trash can. We have yet to buy a disposable and with the exception of the first two days we had Anna (before we could pick up a few more diapers, and we had some free disposables from the hospital) we haven't used any disposables on her at all!

Also of note, different people do things differently, this is the way I do it! Different diapers work for different people too. For us, we found what worked and we're sticking with it!

Outdoor weekend

2011-08-22T10:16:00.000-05:00

*Sidenote: The pictures look funky, I'm not sure why, they're fine on my computer but blogger is doing something funny with them. I'll try taking them off and putting them on later today...

So the weather has been 100% perfect here for about a week or two! So we've spent a lot of time outside. Specifically this weekend.

After a rough week, all I wanted was a family weekend. The 8 month old I watch during the school year started back last week as his mom started school. I watched him back in the spring, but he was still pretty little. And then he spent the summer home with his mom, which was so nice for them and a nice break for me. But now he's at a rough age to be seperated from his mom all day. He just doesn't understand and it's a hard transition for him. I feel so bad for the little guy, and for his mom who I know hates to leave him. He's cried a lot and consequently, it's been equally as hard on me.

So this weekend, we left work behind, and had a blast enjoying the great outdoors. We started off by taking Anna to the local zoo with the free passes we had for doing the library program. She loved watching the animals and even missed her morning nap without caring because she enjoyed it so much! Here are some pictures from the zoo:

Getting ready the night before, in her giraffe pjs with her two favorite friends!

Wallabys! It made me miss Australia!

Checking out the tiger with daddy!

Watching the sea lion get fed

The petting zoo was closed that day, but the goats stuck their head out and the child with no feat pet them anyway!

She enjoyed her zoo experience!

Then after the zoo we went to the park which is across from the zoo. Anna got to swing, play in the water at the splash park, and sit on the slide!

That afternoon Anna took a 3 hour nap and we enjoyed dinner with my family because my sister goes back to school this week!

Then yesterday (Sunday) after Mass we drove to Starved Rock State Park, about an hourish from our house. It's where we went on our honeymoon and we've made it a point to go every year since. There are lots of hiking trails and picnic areas. It was a gorgeous day, like 78 degrees with a little breeze. Perfect for hiking. So we started with a picnic lunch. Then we did some hiking. Jeremy wore Anna in the Mei Tei and couldn't believe how comfortable it was! Anna quickly fell asleep and enjoyed the hike. Here are some pictures from our hike:

Picnicking with daddy!

Very old tree stump. Jeremy and his dad and brothers used to come hike all of the time and they always took a picture with the giant stump... so he felt obligated to take one with Anna!

Picture at lover's leap!

Lots of stairs to get to the actual Starved Rock. Anna was asleep pretty quickly!

Being a ham for everyone, there were lots of people sitting on the bench across from us and she ate it up!

She loves her daddy!

We then came home, had homemade pizzas for dinner and enjoyed watching Anna try to crawl. She's almost there, it will be very very soon! We need to do family weekends like this more often... It was absolutely wonderful and reenergized us all for our work week!

And as a side note, Anna sadly grew out of her 3-6 month clothes (seemingly overnight) and I spent naptime this morning putting them away... It's sad to see her get so big so fast... So a week short of six months and she's moved on to the next size!

Family wedding

2011-08-15T14:04:00.000-05:00

This past weekend was my cousin's wedding. It's a cousin on my mom's side and since my mom is one of nine kids, there is A LOT of family on that side. This particular cousin is just a few months older than I am and we always hung out at family functions. Weddings on this side of the family are always a blast and they're always big. This wedding was no exception! The Mass was beautiful (aside from Anna's "I didn't get my nap" meltdown at the beginning, you know, right as the bride enters the church and everyone gets quite...) and Laura and Ricky both looked wonderful and so very happy. The reception was beautiful with delicious food, lots and lots of family, and a packed dance floor.

We had to laugh after the garter toss because my other cousin Brett, who is a few months younger than I am, caught it. About 7? years ago my cousin Jenny got married. I caught her bouquet. I was the next cousin to get married 3 years ago (Well, there was one in between, but it was a small immediate family wedding that none of us attended). At my wedding, my cousin Laura ended up with the bouquet (after my 7 year old cousin Timmy accidentally caught it...)(Again, in between there actually was a small elopement wedding but none of us went). She was the next cousin to be married this past weekend. Brett? Your turn? Although, my sister has him beat already, so I guess we break that tradition, her wedding is coming up in October! But it was a cause for some laughs and we effectively scared his mom a little bit!

We took quite a few pictures, but I guess it shows our priorities because Anna is in almost every one of them. I didn't get any of the bride and groom because the reception was packed and I spent most of the wedding in the back with Anna (and the camera...). But here are a few anyway!

This girl absolutely adores her daddy!

Hanging out with grandpa on the dance floor!

Myself, Anna, and the bride, Laura!

Anna playing with my cousin Jenny's baby, Jacob, 10 months (that makes him and Anna like 3rd cousins? maybe? I don't know, it's all family to me) But anyway, she was super jealous that he could move faster than she could! Not for long, she got up on all fours today and tried really hard to go somewhere! We're going to have a very young crawler on our hands!

After the wedding Saturday (it was in a southwest Chicago suburb) we stayed the night there (and Anna slept in till like almost 9 the next morning) and went to brunch the next day at my aunt and uncle's house. That's where the last picture was taken. Then my parents and sisters and the three of us went to IK.EA which was just a few minutes away. I could spend all day in that store. I LOVE to organize and it's totally a store made for people like me! It was a fun weekend and kinda like a mini vacation only a week after our other vacation! Today was back to routine!

Ozark Vacation

2011-08-12T14:14:00.000-05:00

We went on vacation last week with Jeremy's family to the Lake of the Ozarks, MO. It was Anna's first vacation and we definitely enjoyed ourselves!

Here are the highlights in pictures:

Anna did great in the car on the 5 hour drive! No major meltdowns and lots of great naps! Of course Minnie helped with that!

Swimming every single day. This child LOVES the pool! Here she's with Nana. Sela, Uncle Joey, Daddy, and Uncle Jason are playing too!

Anna figured out how to splash while we were there. She enjoyed playing with her keys and splashing all of us in the face! She didn't even mind it getting in her face. I'm pretty sure she could spend all day every day in the water!

We were each in charge of dinner one evening. We made homemade pizza roll-ups. But the condo didn't have a rolling pin so I improvised... I used the bottle of vodka instead...

The first night there, Anna slept great but woke up super early (we have blackout shades in her room, but the condo didn't). So we went for a family walk to avoid waking the rest of the condo up. It was beautiful on the lake and since it had been 100+ degrees in the afternoons it was nice to get out before it was beastly hot.

She's so happy!

Can't beat that, taking a nap in the pool

The men and Sela went jet skiing! Daddy and Uncle Jason are in the front jet ski and Uncle Joey and Sela are in the back one.

Hanging out in the frog raft with daddy!

Papa wanted a roasted marshmallow but it was too hot outside. So he roasted it (a giant marshmallow too) with a knife on an ELECTRIC stove! Now that takes talent and creativity.

We went out to dinner twice and Anna enjoyed squealling in her stroller at the table. Anywhere we go she makes sure that everyone pays attention to her. Her squeals are incredibly high pitched and they only have one volume... LOUD!

And since the room was lighter than she was used to and mom and dad were in the same room and it was unfamiliar surroundings, she ended up in our bed each morning... This particular morning, she took over my half and I quickly gave up and did some laundry. I was becoming a little concerned that we'd have a hard time getting her back in her bed when we got home, but she surprised us and sleeps better than ever in her bed, I certainly can't complain with a 5 month old who sleeps 12 hours straight at night, in her own bed and prefers it that way!

Finally the mandatory family picture on the lake. This is from our condo's screened in porch. We had a wonderful time with Jeremy's family and Anna got spoiled with lots of attention and a few trips to the Outlet mall where we found fantastic sales at the Cart.er's outlet, including a really adorable dress that she'll be wearing to my cousin's wedding tomorrow! Thanks Nana and Papa for the vacation, it was great to spend time with family!

Video

2011-08-09T12:08:00.000-05:00

Well, I'm working on a post about our vacation last week, but we've been busy since we've been back, so it may be a few more days. But for now, here's a cute video of Anna talking! She's become quite chatty lately and has all kinds of sounds now!

2011-08-08T14:20:00.000-05:00

Dear Headache,

There's a lot I want and need to get done while Anna takes her nice long nap...

And there's a sweet baby that wants lots of smiles and snuggles when she wakes up...

She does not want a cranky mama...

And I'm tired of fighting with you every day at 2:00...

So please go away! (and stay away!)

Sincerely,
Karen

Last Post-Placement Visit

2011-08-03T13:00:00.000-05:00

We had Anna's final post-placement visit on Thursday! Which means, our lawyer can now set a court date. Which means, in about a month (because apparently our lawyer is pretty prompt as he should be for the amount of money we paid him) and Anna will be legally adopted! It also means that we have written out our last check for this adoption. We joke with Anna that now we're done "paying her off."

I think about her adoption day a lot. I want to celebrate it in a big way. I can't wait for it to get here. I can't wait to have that piece of paper that legally list her name as Anna Clare Head instead of Baby Girl.

However, nothing will actually change on that day for our family. She won't be any more OUR daughter than she was before. She won't be any more a part of our family, she always has been a part of our family and she always will be, legal adoption or not. So it's kinda hard to explain why I'm so excited for it. Maybe it's because at that point the state recognizes her as our daughter. At that point, there is no one that will come to our house every month to make sure we're fit parents (as much as we love our case worker, it's kinda irritating to have to be "checked-up on" but it's the law so we gladly oblige). At that point, we are finished paying for her adoption, no more surprise court fees, no more lawyer fees, no more homestudy fees or adoption checks or anything else. No more strings attached. That's the kicker I guess, she's free to simply be our daughter forever and for always. No longer is she binded to the state on paper.

And it's at that point that legally we can begin the proces of adopting again. Yeah, I'm also excited for that aspect of it. The "permission" to have another child.

I guess sometimes the system seems a little backwards because my husband and I have to jump through 4,000 hoops in order to have a child and meanwhile the state has to check and make sure we've crossed all our t's and dotted all our i's and we've paid them enough money and we've made sure our vitamins and medicine are in a locked box and we've provided enough square footage for our child. And there are people who live recklessly and get pregnant all the time and have nowhere to live and don't have the means or the desire to care for their child(ren) or simply see them as a burden and decide that child shouldn't live at all and abort them or abuse or neglect their children. Where are the case workers checking up on them? How come they can have children with no hoops?

So really I didn't intend to rant. I feel beyond blessed that we have had the opportunity to grow our family through adoption. I'm thankful for our infertility because otherwise we wouldn't have our daughter, Anna. And I wouldn't trade her for the world. And I think all of the hard work, money, time, etc... we spend trying to have children makes us appreciate her and our future children even more and ultimately brings us closer in our faith.

100th Post: Please follow

2011-08-01T10:00:00.000-05:00

Wow, I've reached my 100th blog post!

When I started this blog, we were in the midst of infertility and I needed an outlet to write my feelings and frustrations out. I didn't care if anyone read it, it was kind of like a journal for me and a way for me to share some of my Catholic faith. However, as our adoption journey began it became a way for me to share our story and keep people updated on how things were going and where we were at. Then when we had our adoption fallthrough, it became a source of comfort to see and hear from people who were praying for us and we didn't even know it. It was extremely helpful to have this outlet and to have so much support from those close to us and those far away.

Now, with our sweet little Anna and all of the fun and craziness and love that she brings to our lives, it's wonderful to be able to share that with others. I'm glad that people who we don't see regularly can read about our story, see pictures of our daughter and keep updated on our lives. And lately it seems like she's doing so much developmentally and we're so in awe that she's in our home that I can't help but to share it! It's amazing how connected we can stay through technology. It is also nice to know that there are people reading who are encouraged by our story because they're in the midst of infertility or adoption or fall-throughs, or simply marriage or thinking about their future. I hope that our story has been encouraging and a lesson in faith and patience. (I know it's been that for me).

I also am extremely glad that I documented my feelings and the events that have gotten us to where we are today. I was reading a lot of my old posts the other day since Anna's decided that naps are a good thing, and there were details that I forget about. The day we found out we wouldn't have biological children, the day we found out we wouldn't be adopting the little baby boy, the day we found out about and picked up Anna, etc... I'm so glad I have documentation of all of these things. It's so easy to forget about how you felt in different situations and it makes me appreciate the blessing of our daughter even more to be able to look back and see the rough times that led up to us becoming parents.

With that being said, I want to know who is reading. I have a lot of people say "Hey, I read your blog, your ..... was so nice or .... was so cute!" I love to hear it! I'm glad people are reading, it's changed a lot since when I started. I didn't care if people read or not, it didn't really matter to me. Now, it matters to me and to my family. I want Anna to be able to see all of the people that prayed for her, cared for her, read updates about her, etc... It's a true testatment to community and prayer and I want to share that with her.

So, what I'm asking is that you "Follow" my blog so that I can see who is reading. There's a little tab on the right that says something like "Join this site" at the very bottom. Will you do me a favor and just click on it and put your name or website there? You're also more than welcome to comment, let me know you're reading! Like I said, I think it's wonderful that you're reading. I used to feel "creepy" when I read people's blogs, but you know what, that's why I write it, so people will read it! It's not creepy, if it were, I would make it private/not share it on the internet! I'm glad you're reading and I'm glad to share our story with you! So do me a favor, be not creepy and let me know you're reading! All it does is allow me to see who is catching up on our lives, and I'm really grateful for all of your prayers and support!

I've always been told that it takes a village to raise a child and since becoming a parent, I definitely believe it! You're all a part of Anna's "village" and I want to be able to share you all with her!

Thanks so much! I really appreciate it!

Big stuff!

2011-07-30T18:55:00.000-05:00

Here's a short video of Anna and her sippy cup. She LOVES cups, so we got her some of her own a month ago and she took to them quickly! We put a little water in there and she goes to town. A lot ends up on her shirt, but she definitely has the hang of it!

Now that she can roll over, she spends lots of time on her tummy and as of today has figured out how to army crawl, although she's not fast yet, she will be soon!

Such a ham at 5 months old!

Small Things with Great Love

Thanks for the sleep Anna!

Tired (Updated)

Happy Valentine's Day

Rearrangement

Friday Quick Takes (13)

Slam Dunk

9 Years

11 Months Old

Friday Quick Takes (12)

The Recurring Ear Infection

Life

Friday Quick Takes (11)

Naptime Adjustment Day 1

Busy Busy

Goal

Friday Quick Takes (10)

2011 Recap

7 Quick Takes (9)

10 Months Old

Merry Christmas

Sentiment

Updates

Hide-n-seek Nativity

On Santa

Journey to Adoption #2

Castles... In Scotland

7 Quick Takes (8)

Snow!

7 Quick Takes (7)

A new agency

9 Months Old

Late Night Freak-Out

Videos

7 Quick Takes (6)

Distinguished Title

Our weekend in pictures

The Right Mass

7 Quick Takes (5)

Thankful

Scrapbooking

Quick Takes (4)

National Adoption Month

Holidays

8 Months Old

Family date night

Bad day

Wedding Weekend

Friends and Family

Out

Family/6 month/Adoption pictures

Quick Takes (3)

Chaos to Quiet

Clumsy

Saturday Snapshots

Prayers for a friend

Anna's Eyes 2

On School

Quick Takes (2)

7 months, 100 years, and a Godson

Quick Takes (1)

FINALIZATION!!!

Bath, Bears, and Crawling

Rainy Day

Rundown

Giraffe... *Updated*

Meal Planning

6 months old!

Final Adoption Day!

Cloth Diapers

Outdoor weekend

Family wedding

Ozark Vacation

Video

Last Post-Placement Visit

100th Post: Please follow

Big stuff!

Giraffe... Updated